I took Monday and Tuesday off so I could drive to Tulsa to attend Travis Baldree’s book signing for Brigands & Breadknives. He talked about writing, answered questions, and read from Chapter 15. He narrates the audiobooks of this series, and I highly recommend listening to them, because he is a delight.
I got to read poems and listen to some great music at Joan of Bark at Rubber Gloves on Wednesday (and also going to be performing on December 13 at the Fest, which you should come see if you’re local or want a reason to travel to Denton)!
This is the collab I didn’t know I needed. “No Good Deed” with Cynthia Erivo and Misty Copeland.
I am very excited about this evening and tomorrow, when I will be catching up on all the taking care of my home that I have been neglecting whilst out gallivanting around. I might even go ahead and put up the tree. ‘Tis (almost) the season!
This week holds more news than Friday Five. This week has been…whew. So I bring you the Sunday Seven.
First, my car has decided it is tired, so I have been shopping around for a new one, and I found it! Soon, a sweet little Nissan Versa will join the family. That’s a fun/nerve-wracking/expensive process, but as soon as the necessary paperwork is finalized, she’s mine!
Here are five other things I read/watched/have been pondering this week:
Full co-sign on this article on letting your college kid decorate their own dorm. I have such great memories of working with my freshman roommate and suitemates to curate our own space. We had a collage of pictures in the bathroom that we created from magazines. It was epic and a great conversation piece. Remember that this is the first time a lot of new adults get to make all the decisions about what their home looks like. As a seasoned university housing professional, I beg of you – don’t rob your kids of this experience! Talk to them and follow their lead on how much (if any) help they want (PSA – advice not limited to housing. They’re grown. You did a good job raising them to be adults. Trust yourself and them, and let them do it!).
I’m rewatching Scandal these days. It’s one of my comfort shows. If I were still writing fanfiction when Scandal came out, I would have shipped Liv and Mellie so hard. I love Scandal in general, but if I were to list my top ten favorite scenes, their scenes together would make up more than half of them.
I agree with Brigid Misselhorn of MMD. I do enjoy seasonal reading. I usually try to sneak in a few seasonal reads every month. For the record, spooky season (which ranges from cozy fantasy to dark academia to horror) is August through January. I said what I said, and I will not be taking any questions on the matter.
I also have seasonal to-do lists. I like this one from Joy Wilson (aka Joy the Baker). Since I rent, most of the maintenance is done by my property management, so I don’t have to worry about the specific seasonal things homeowners do (one thing off my to-do list – I’ll take it.). These are mostly things I do at the beginning of every season, but there are a few fall-specific things I like to complete each September:
Step 4 of my Epic Meal Planning process – Snowed-in Meals. Clean out pantry/fridge/freezer by making as many weird meals as I can with what I have to make room for groceries for the upcoming season (yay soup!).
Speaking of soup, chop/bag/freeze several rounds of the trinity (onion, carrots, celery) so that they are ready to go. I also would like to take a page out of JTB’s book and do this with cookie dough. Maybe I will be that person someday. That sounds perfect, especially for cozier months.
Clean off tables/surfaces. Piles accumulate so easily in my home, and this is where they land. Right now, I think my efforts have just resulted in different, more organized piles, but over the next few weeks, everything I actually keep will hopefully get to where it belongs.
Change my air filter.
Clean out closets and assess what needs to be donated/repaired/replaced.
Look at this year’s resolutions and assess progress. Tweak as needed. Specifically, start to organize next-ten-years bucket list into categories.
Find three fun fall things to enjoy.
Start thinking about holiday plans, including travel, writing, cooking/baking. Looking forward to how my theme of wonder is going to show up this year!
I am looking forward to more fall(ish) weather that we’re supposed to have pretty soon. I hope you have had a good weekend and have a smooth week ahead!
Here are some short reads and happy news that have made things easier for me this week/month.
I’m so happy Addie Zierman is writing on the internet again – The Notebook Years
A wonderful gift in my inbox this morning in the Shondaland newsletter – Rachel Simon’s series on moments and characters in TV that make us feel less alone. She’s specifically focusing on Grey’s Anatomy, and I especially like this one, but it would be easy to make the point for so many shows.
I appreciate this article on The Tyranny of Being Reachable so much. I feel this in my bones. “In today’s culture, your responsiveness equals your worth. It’s a proxy for your love, your professionalism, your care.” And a paragraph down from that – “You’re not unreliable. The human brain just wasn’t built for this.” Thank you, Miski Omar from The Guardian. Thank you.
Simplified’s fall collection comes out next week. This includes 2026 planners, and I’m delighted that they brought back the bookbound ones this year!
Tonight we have our Summerween (Summer Halloween, if you will. Halloween is forever.) cookbook club. I made Butterfinger fudge because the colors match the theme, and I made a nice cheat-y recipe. Still delicious. It really is easy to make a passable fudge as long as you have a combo of sugar, milk, fat, and cocoa. Or, in this case, sweetened condensed milk (sugar and milk) and chocolate chips (fat and cocoa).
Happy Friday, folks! June is up and running! We are three down/ten to go with orientation sessions for new students and their parents this week, so it’s been busy at work. And tonight is Pridenton’s Night Out, and my church has a booth, so that’s my Friday night. Luckily, I have a few days off next week to go hang out with my parents, so that’s something to look forward to.
Additionally, this has been a great morning:
My sister came to visit at work (she is going on a trip and wanted to take her friends some of UNT’s special coffee blend from Voltage) and we got to have coffee and bagels together.
I got some excellent news that is really going to make my financial life easier.
I was able to help two students who were struggling/anxious about housing next year get exactly what they need.
One of my staff who has been on a tour with the UNT acapella choir is back and I get to hear his stories soon.
I get to have lunch on the square with the office folk today.
Here are some things I’ve enjoyed reading in the last few weeks (months? It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these):
As a member of Tori Dunlap’s 100K Club (shameless plug) (which I originally typed “shameless plum” – I’m so hungry and also I may have just given myself an idea for a children’s book), I have been thinking a lot about value categories when it comes to my budget. These are the things that aren’t needs but that I still make room for in the budget because they bring me joy or enrich my life in some way. When I first joined the community, I had office supplies + stationery + accessories on my list because I love them so much. While I have since begrudgingly admitted that maybe I don’t need a whole budget category for writing implements, gosh, I love a good pencil.
I don’t know if “cozy” and “challenge” would be found together in any sentence I mutter (I lean more toward do-nothing cozy), but this list for summer is nice. Take your dog on a date? Come on, that’s adorable.
Joy the Baker’s guide to a joyful summer is more my speed when it comes to summer to-do lists. Gentle suggestions. Things that make life easier/more pleasant. And if you think I’m not looking for that banana malt icebox cake recipe in my inbox every single day, have we even met?
Everything about this is powerful and I love it and also I despise that we are living in times where two international students at Harvard singing “There’s a Place for Us” to honor Rita Moreno is especially poignant. I have a lot of feelings.
Speaking of things that give me a lot of feelings, OMG YAY.
I hope you have a lovely weekend full of whatever gives you the most peace.
Hello, June. I’m trying hard to get into the spirit of you. It may be easier this year, since I’m spending more time at the farm. I loved June in the Panhandle, growing up. It was almost as good as October. We’ll see if the magic still persists.
Speaking of magic, I have not been great at pursuing my exploration of wonder this year. There are reasons, but I’d still like to do better. After all, the whole point of cultivating a practice of wonder is to have it in place for when things are *gestures broadly* I think I’m going to start Awestruck: 52 Experiments To Find Wonder, Joy, and Meaning in Everyday Life by Alexandra Franzen [inspire/self-help/community care] this month. And continue on with Year of Wonder: Classical Music To Enjoy Day by Day by Clemency Burton-Hill [essays? Daily prompts?], which has been excellent. I also want to read On Thriving by Brandi Sellerz-Jackson [inspire/self-help/community care] early in the month so I can get it back to the library for the people waiting on it. Hopefully, these will inspire me to embrace the wonder in everyday life a little better.
What I have been great at is carving out time every day to read. Here’s hoping June brings even more of that.
Library
In addition to On Thriving, there are several other books I need to return to the library this month.
The Author’s Guide to Murder by Beatriz Williams, Lauren Willig, and Karen White [mystery/suspense] – Rise & Shine is a mystery theme this month!
Under the Whispering Door by T.J. Klune [fantasy/nonrealism] – Follow the Reader’s choose your own adventure with a queer theme for Pride Month
Nevada by Imogen Binnie [queer lit] – also an FTR pick
Reading Challenges
Some of my favorite things about summer are the extra reading challenges and an abundance of readathons. Apparently, to many people, summer means more time to read, and that is delightful. Our public library has a challenge that lets you earn free books. As I also make space for Modern Mrs. Darcy’s Summer Reading Guide (the Minimalist List can be found here) by putting as many as my library has ordered on my hold list and eagerly await the possibility of a 52 Book Club summer challenge, I don’t want to neglect the yearly challenges I’m trying to finish. I know I have at least one official readathon coming up in July, but I know I will add more just for kicks, including a mini-retreat this Saturday. There are just too many good books I want to read! And by too many, I do mean never enough and please keep writing more great books, dear authors.
For this month…
52 Book Club:
Hurricane Summer by Asha Bromfield – Genre two: set in summer [general YA]
The Bodyguard by Katherine Center – A crossover (set in a shared universe) [favorite authors]
The Rom-Commers by Katherine Center – Shares universe with previous prompt [favorite authors]
Kill Joy by Holly Jackson – A prequel [mystery/suspense]
Libro.fm:
Under the Whispering Door by T.J. Klune – Listen to an audiobook by an LGBTQIA+ author [fantasy/nonrealism]
Kingmaker by Sonia Purnell – Read an audiobook about a historical figure and/or event [general nonfiction]
Nevada by Imogen Binnie – Listen to an audiobook by a transgender author [queer lit]
Her Body and Other Parties by Carmen Maria Machado – Listen to an anthology or short story collection [essays/short stories]
Bad Bitch Book Club:
Dumplin’ by Julie Murphy – A book set in the state/region where you live [general YA]
The Full Moon Coffee Shop by Mai Mochizuki – A book with astrology as a main plot point [fantasy/magical realism]
A bit of catch-up with the books I’ve planned for previous months
Nowhere Book Bingo:
All Fours by Miranda July – Book rec from a friend (thanks, Sarah!) [general fiction]
The Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton – your favorite author’s favorite book – as choosing a favorite author is like asking someone to choose a favorite book (i.e., impossible), this is one of the favorite books of one of my favorite authors (Roxane Gay) [general fiction]
I’ve already plotted out all my intended reads for the Overeducated Women With Cats challenge in previous months. So all that is left to do for that challenge is to finish reading them. Maybe I will have them finished by the end of summer.
Looking forward to my mini-retreat this Saturday. I already had my snacks planned (because priorities), and now I have my TBR ready to go!
Do your reading habits change with the seasons? If so, how?
I’ve had the draft document for this post open with nothing but a title for three days. That seems ominous.
Do I even have plans this summer? Or is it just something I have to get through until the weather is nice enough to wear my boots again?
I know why I’m hesitant. It makes sense. Summer is the busiest time at my job, so while everyone else is making plans to go on vacation, have fun outings, embrace all the summer programs that their community has to offer, and just generally live their best lives, I’m going to be super busy most days and, subsequently, too worn out by the time evening comes around to want to do any of those things.
I’m also checking in on my parents more, which means at least every other weekend will be spent working on things at the farm, hanging out with my new bird friends (see above), and helping Mom and Dad plan and navigate whatever the next phase will bring.
I’m not really looking for more plans.
In fact, what would make my summer better is to find things to take off my plate. That seems unlikely, though.
I don’t want to suck at my job or abandon my family. I also don’t want to drop off the face of the earth with friends or miss out on the things that bring me the most joy.
But it’s just a lot, and I probably need to use some of that PTO I have stored up.
So my bucket list this summer is more of to-not-do list. And it’s just two things:
Find 5-10 random days to take off. I’m leaning toward 5 right now, but if things start getting nuttier, it’s gonna need to be closer to 10.
DON’T. TELL. ANYONE. As soon as I say, “I’m really looking forward to taking a couple of days off next week,” people like to respond with “Ooh, we could do something!”
Which is great. Truly. I adore the place of love and excitement that comes from. I’m glad people still want to hang out with me even when I’m not my very best self, which seems to be all the time these days.
But the moment I start making plans on my day off…I no longer have the day off. Sure, I may get to sleep in or have more leisure time, and I guess that’s better than nothing. But once I make a plan with someone else, that whole day is now centered around making sure I don’t get too involved in a project or task – or even a spontaneous outing, if that’s where the day’s whims take me – that I forget or show up late to the plans I made. And I’m very bad at turning down things that sound fun with people I love simply because I need to rest. While I strive to be better at this, I recognize that I’m not there yet, so I’m removing the temptation altogether by not letting anyone think I’m available when I’m not.
Whew.
Saying I’m not available when I have the day off is uncomfortable for me. I have struggled with being honest about what I need for most of my adult life. Peeling off the people-pleasing layers I clung to during childhood is hard, and this one is particularly thick.
If I’m going to stay at the same place, this is how I want it to improve.
If I wasn’t careful, this theme would lead me into a world of rabbit holes and contingency plans. I’m not opposed to either of those things, but I’m not sure I’m at a place to take on a whole year of them.
In other words, “if” isn’t quite ringing true for me. I want a word that captures the mystery of “if…” without the ellipses. Without boxing myself into its implied necessary action. I’m not opposed to taking action. I’m just wary of obligation.
So instead of “if” and all its intense expectations, I’m going to dive deep into wonder and all of its questions.
Merriam-Webster has several definitions of wonder that I love:
A cause of astonishment
The quality of exciting amazed admiration
Rapt attention or astonishment at something awesomely mysterious or new to one’s experience
To feel surprise
To feel curiosity or doubt
Marvel
Miracle
Yes, please. All of that. I want a year of being open to mystery. I want a life that leaves room for both curiosity and doubt. I want a year on which I can look back and marvel.
After all, I’m turning 50 this year. I want to be open to big things.
This is one of my favorite days of the year – the day that I make resolutions and set goals for the next 12 months. It seems contrary to the nature of wonder, however, to predetermine what is going to happen the whole year. So I’m going to jot down some wishes – things that might be fun or interesting – with just enough structure to be measurable in case they develop into actual goals but also enough room for interpretation to allow them to evolve or disintegrate as needed, depending on…*gestures broadly*
My wishes for 2025:
To read 180 books (per yesterday’s post).
To look for opportunities for wonder. I want to be charmed by the world. I want to recapture the delight in simple things and little kindnesses. I crave whimsy. And I don’t want it just for me – I want to share it.
To buy 50 books (one for each year I’ve been alive) in person from independent bookstores. Originally, this goal was to buy 5 books each at 10 different bookstores, but then I started listing bookstores I want to visit..and it’s more than 10. So still 50 total, but I’m going to spread the love a little more broadly.
To cook at least 50 meals. This past year was unusual, and there were whole months in which I did not cook at all. To be clear, that doesn’t mean I just ate takeout (although I did that more frequently than usual). A lot of the food I buy is premade and ready to assemble and eat as snacks or salads or sandwiches, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Fed is best. But I also miss cooking, and I feel better when I do so on a regular basis. I want to average at least one cooked meal a week (with a couple of weeks off during staff training or holidays).
To set and meet 50 small financial goals. I didn’t talk about the goal I set for my finances last year, because medical expenses are expensive and I didn’t have the confidence that I’d actually be able to make it. But I did. I saved a month’s salary in an emergency fund. And then I made the first payment on a medical bill (which is exactly what emergency funds are for, I guess). And I built my savings back up. And made another first payment on a different medical bill. And I have – for the third time – almost reached a month’s salary in savings again. This didn’t happen spontaneously, though. I did it by setting monthly financial goals for both my outgoing budget and my savings. This year, there are additional things I want to do that will help me (eventually) draft a retirement plan, so I’m going to work those goals in as well. I do not harbor delusions that I will be able to retire fully any time soon (if ever), but with a little preparation, I think I can see a lighter workload on the distant horizon.
To write 50,000 words. This may be one story, or it may be 100. I just want to get back into a regular writing practice.
To consistently meet daily goals on my Finch app. Most of my reminders to eat, or drink water, or do something creative (whether that be writing or knitting or music or whatever), or take a walk/stretch break, come through Finch. Neurospicy folk, gamify the daily activities everyone else thinks of as habits. This app has helped me so much.
To make a list of 50 fun things to do in the next 10 years. I already have a few ideas, but I am going to take the whole year to decide what makes the final cut. Something to look forward to!
This is a long and ambitious list, and I fully expect my intentions to wax and wane as the year throws whatever curve balls it’s got up its sleeve. After all, sometimes just surviving is the only accomplishment a person needs to achieve.
But these wishes give me hope and spark a little bit of the type of wonder that I desperately want this year.
Ah, December. Wonderful and wild. Full of parties and Advent festivities. My favorite time for reflection and anticipation.
I’m equal parts excited and tired already.
Because the first part of the month is always so busy, my reading needs to be generally lighthearted and easy. I need books that soothe my mind and soul after a busy day. I’ve already finished the books we’re discussing at book clubs this month, and I’ve lost interest in actually finishing the remaining reading challenges this year. So I can really just read whatever I like. I mean, I can do that all the time, but I’m not putting any self-imposed parameters on my choices this month.
Except for one. I need to get some of my library books back to the library. I have an excessive amount checked out. It’s absurd. So I need to read the ones I’m actually still interested in and just return the ones I’m not. I would love to blank-slate my library check-outs this month, but I’ll settle for cutting them in half.
Also, I’m still planning on finishing my main goal of 180 books for the year. It will be a tight race, but I think I can do it.
Here are my plans as of now.
Books for Advent (i.e., read as part of my daily Advent practice, so finish before Christmas Day)
Welcome to August! The staff have been in training this week, and today was their big breakfast, so I went in early to cover the office so they all could go. I am glad I went in this morning, but after treatment, I was even happier to go home, have a leisurely lunch, run some errands, and check in with my stylist to tame these cute little tufts that are forming all over my head.
I’m at the point in my treatment where the end is in sight. So even though I still feel fatigued and itchy and constantly on the verge of infection (I’m assured I’m fine – it’s just part of the fatigue – but I’m taking a ridiculous amount of vitamins and treating it like a precursor to a cold anyway), I’m starting to notice again how much I’m missing out on by just not having the energy to do more than the bare minimum.
I don’t subscribe to a lot of paid Substack accounts, but Roxane Gay’s posts are well worth the small fee I pay each month for it. I get access to her book club discussions, and essays on things like learning to write again from a seasoned writer and educator. I feel like I’m learning to write again as well. I’ve been journaling, but it’s not the same as losing myself in fiction or poetry, and I’m pretty rusty. It’s been a bit of a slog, and I’m grateful to hear that this, too, is common and overcomeable (a word? I don’t think that’s a word. Welp, it is now).
Here are some other things I’ve enjoyed reading this week:.
It is so hard to find a therapist. I feel this post in my soul. Dr. Chanequa Walker-Barnes is one of my main go-to sources for practical advice when it comes to self-care and rest. She echoes a lot of my own struggles in this piece.
I love Joy the Baker’s team and their Let It Be Sunday posts, and this past Sunday’s edition was especially good. I particularly enjoyed the pieces on how to cope with the social exhaustion of work (and I have needed these tips this week with all the training) and tips on travel (which is something else I may be interested in as I come out of my treatment fog. Maybe. We’ll see. Got some ideas for my birthday next March.).
Mountain Ash Press is having a submissions contest. I don’t project having a manuscript that’s ready to submit by August 31 myself, but if you do, check it out and see if it’s a good fit!
I love the post from Modern Mrs. Darcy about one of my favorite mystery series. If I were to name a place in literature I’d like to visit, Three Pines would be at the top of my list. If you haven’t read any Inspector Gamache, here’s a good Louise Penny Starter Kit for you.
I hope that your week has been OK and that you have a good and restful weekend. Take care, friends!
The past few years, I’ve made a summer bucket list. Mostly, I’ve done it because I have to talk myself into liking summer as a season because it is so, so hot in Texas and that’s the worst. It also keeps me more grounded in the present instead of always focusing on future plans. And of course, making these lists is also a good way to check in with goals to either make sure I’m on track or get myself back on track.
So why not do that with every season?
Here are some things I want to do this spring.
Buy fresh flowers. I have received so many flowers this year, and it’s been lovely. I mean, some of them have made me sneeze and thus had to live elsewhere for a little while. But I really love seeing fresh flowers when I come home. Bonus to picking out/buying them myself? I know I’ll get what I love and still be able to breathe normally.
Plant citrus trees. My friend Jessica gave me a bunch of citrus seeds, and soon (this weekend, maybe?) I’m going to plant them in buckets to see if they come up. I’ve already got the pots and the soil, so all that’s left to do is plant!
Drink tea and read when it rains. It rains so much this time of year, and I don’t take advantage of that nearly as often as I could. A cup of tea and a good book are excellent accompaniments to a chorus of rain. It’s my ideal quiet morning/afternoon/any time.
Play springy playlist when cooking. Cooking is relaxing to me, but lately it’s been mostly a utilitarian, get-in-get-out, cutting-corners process. I want to reintroduce my former habit of playing music to set the mood and make cooking more fun. I have all sorts of playlists for this already (brunch, spring, etc.); it’s just a matter of remembering to put one on when I start.
Get my feet ready for sandal season. I often neglect my feet during winter. I’ve been doing better this year out of necessity (the neuropathy side effects of chemo are no joke), but I still want to give them a little extra TLC before I expose them to the elements with summer footwear.
Re-establish my strength routine and take some long walks. My back seized up for the first time ever last week. Clearly a sign that I’ve been slacking on my core strength. Or that I’m just getting older. But a solid strength routine and regular walks can only help with both physical and mental health, so I want to make both a priority again.
Visit the Denton Community Market. This is the best place to get local, seasonal produce. Also, it’s just one of my favorite things Denton does. Bonus to going in spring rather than summer – the weather outside may actually be bearable.
M. Suzanne Terry 