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Friday Five – Last Day

Well, friends. The day has come. My last day of working for UNT Housing. From my start as a night desk clerk to the leader of our amazing tour team, it’s been a little over 20 years of meeting loads of people I love and helping students feel at home on campus. I’m excited about my new adventure as an academic advisor, though!

Here are some lovely things that have given me much-needed pauses as I plowed through the to-do list of things to make next week easier for the staff.

  • I love this poem by Rudy Franciso. I love the “Amen” chorus from the audience, too. “It’s hard being alive, but it looks so good on you.”
  • I miss Let It Be Sunday, but I love the new Joy the Baker monthly series, The Bakehouse Almanac. I think I shall subscribe to a new analog magazine (for free through my AARP, of course. Because I’m old enough to qualify for AARP, and I have a lot of participation points to burn.)!
  • I am grateful for this reframe of “This Will Be My Year” from Dr. Chanequa Walker-Barnes. Regardless of what happens to me and in the world, did I do my best? Did I take care of myself? Did I take care of my relationships (or, in the case of 2024, did they take exceptionally good care of me)? Did I experience joy? In that light, yes. 2020, 2024, 2025 – each of these has indeed been my year, and I expect that 2026 will be as well. There will be lots of opportunities to practice those four things.
  • There is hope for Patchouli Joe’s! They have a GoFundMe to raise money to transition to a new location. Please donate to help if you can.
  • I love The Residence so much. I wish it had gotten renewed. It was worth every dollar of production costs, and Netflix is a fool. I’m glad these actors are getting recognition for their great work.

And one bonus salve for the weary – A Blessing for the Weak by Nadia Bolz-Weber

Have a good weekend!

Note to Little Me

The coziest (and the best) way to ring in the new year? Snacks, wine, comfort of my own home.

I love the Montana Happy newsletter. It’s always full of cozy crafts, recipes, and tips. It’s a much-needed shelter in the storm of the world. In exploring cozy as a theme this year, I am working my way through this list of prompts.

  • Hygge prompt #1 – What advice would you give your younger self with your current knowledge if given a time machine? What changes would you make?

Not that my younger self would have listened…but here goes.

That interdisciplinary major you’re considering during grad school (the one that would give you a foot in the door to library science)? DO IT. You can still teach public speaking and work night desk and be an assignment coordinator. These will be the jobs that give you the best stories and where you will meet some of your favorite people. But it would also be nice to have some sweet librarian training in your back pocket when you’re ready to branch out.

Don’t stop dancing and running. It’s hard to get that momentum back after you lose it, and you will miss it when it’s gone.

Ditto re: playing piano and French horn. 

Don’t sell your French horn. Maybe stick with a digital piano/full-sized keyboard instead of the upright grand, though. That was…a lot.

The pavement on Fry Street is dangerously uneven. Tread cautiously. Your left knee, in particular, will thank you. Also, maybe don’t drink the WHOLE beer tower. Just a thought.

In fact, go ahead and slow down on the drinking in general. One or two glasses of wine at a time is fine, and it is definitely less expensive. If you need to be buzzed to feel comfortable at a place, just leave the place. You could be home and reading. 

We still love home and reading.

You don’t want to live in the downstairs apartment. Having upstairs neighbors is THE WORST.

Look closely for bug problems before you move in. No apartment is cute enough to be worth the hassle of getting rid of an infestation.

Those things that you keep seeing ads for that you think you’d really enjoy having? You won’t. Just keep scrolling. I guarantee there’s a cute cat video coming up, and it’s free.

The cancer diagnosis isn’t the end of the world. You survive, and your friends really come through for you. Go ahead and push for the reconstructive surgery while they have you on the table, though.

When the church you love dissolves, don’t rush into replacing it. Save yourself some religious trauma and take a real break. But keep that weird little liturgical one you visited in the back of your mind. You’re going to love them someday.

I know loneliness sucks. And it will suck for a long time, especially when it seems like everyone around you is pairing off, so buckle up. But don’t waste so much time wanting a partner. Your life is already rich with love, and you will absolutely adore living alone. Once you get there, you will realize that it would take a truly exceptional connection to merit giving that up. Hold out for it.

When you feel like you have to choose between loving others well and wanting to hold them to your own moral code (which, despite everything you’ve been taught, they are not – in any way – obligated to adhere to), choose love. Every time. Your moral code will change as you learn and grow, and you will regret the harm that you did before you knew better. But you will never regret loving extravagantly. 

Love extravagantly.

Love yourself. To quote Tova Goodman’s six-word memoir, “Little me would’ve liked big me.”

This was my first week back at work after the break, and it really acted like it. As expected, the ambition of well-rested, cozy, mostly-feral Suzanne has cooled, so I’m trying to find my bearings with all the resolutions I made. 

Also, the world is spiraling (and our country bears more than our fair share of blame for that, especially right now. Just…what are we doing. And CAN WE NOT?). ICE needs to stay in their lane (and by “stay in their lane” I do mean “be dismantled”) and held accountable for literally everything they do. 

I would not be the least bit surprised if we discovered dragons were real this year. The big, fire-breathing kind – not the small, cute ones we already know about. Given the propensity of people with more money than sense to poke around in the depths of the ocean and other places we would do well to leave alone, it’s a distinct possibility.

Nevertheless, I have managed to find some nice things to share with you. I have a couple of recipes that I tried this week, and some cozy items that might give you a brief respite from *gestures broadly* 

So enjoy!

  • Matthew Bounds’s White Chicken Chili – I’ve never made a recipe of his that I didn’t like, and this is no exception. Most white chicken chili uses heavy cream, but this one thickens with instant potatoes (I used the garlic ones), which makes it the clear frontrunner for me. Anything I can eat without taking a Lactaid (and bonus if it includes potatoes in any form) is superior in my book.
  • Dan Whalen’s Deviled Pickles – Deviled eggs are not my favorite. Part of my aversion is due to the use of mayonnaise, but mostly I am not a fan of the texture and smell of boiled eggs. Deviled pickles, however? All the delicious things about a deviled egg with none of the things that tend to give me the ick. I used whipped cream cheese and used a plant-based (ergo, non-eggy) mayo in this recipe, leaving the filling mostly just cheese and happiness. I 100% ate the leftover filling with chips. Delightful.
  • I like these cozy prompts from Montana Happy’s hygge list and will likely turn some of them into posts this year. I’ve already started with the advice to my younger self and my dream house. Stay tuned.
  • At some point this weekend, I’m going to take down the Christmas tree. Epiphany has arrived. It’s time. Also, I have plans for that corner, and the tree is in the way. But it always makes me a little sad to put it back in storage. As luck would have it, Modern Mrs. Darcy’s “Links I Love” featured this gem from the Nester on making the seasonal transition less gloomy. I think I can conjure up some things with my excess of twinkle lights and jars around the succulents that have come indoors for the winter (assuming winter ever manages to actually get here). Maybe I’ll incorporate them into the plans for that corner.
  • While one of my favorite local indie bookshops is closing, did you know that over 30 either opened in the past year or will open soon in Texas? That’s good news!

I hope you have a good weekend. I hope you get a much-needed hangout with friends or take a much-needed break from hanging out with people, whatever the case may be. Good wishes for you and yours.

January 2026 TBR

Happy January, friends! As you can deduce from the picture, I’m utilizing my library card a lot these days. Trying to reorganize the shelves to make room for the books I own is a whole cozy project and one of the first on my list to tackle this year. Anything I can do to slow the inflow of new books that need to find a space will help.

To be clear, I’m not…not buying books. Don’t be absurd. Just not buying as many.

Anyway, here are the reading plans this month. I’ve finished a few from this list already, but I’m looking forward to the rest!

Book Clubs

  • The Most Wonderful Crime of the Year by Ally Carter – I listened to this one on the way to and from the farm at Christmas. So good! Although the male voice on the audio gets low and hard to hear at points. That added some stress I didn’t need in holiday traffic. Delightful otherwise, though.
  • The Kaiju Preservation Society by John Scalzi – This is for the second meeting of the fantasy book club at a local bookshop that has just announced they’re CLOSING!!! Sad times! I guess we’ll see tomorrow what the plan is going forward, if there is one.
  • Maggie; Or, a Man and a Woman Walk Into a Bar by Katie Yee 
  • Constellations of Care by Cindy Barukh Milstein 
  • This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone 
  • I may not be able to attend the Rise & Shine book club this month. The theme is “something old,” so I would love to gush over Wilkie Collins’s The Woman in White, which is one of my faves. Of course, it falls on the one Saturday this month I have to work. And of course, March’s meeting (when the theme is “something funny” – I love funny things and would love to get all those recs!) does, too. UGH.

Series

I’m a sucker for series. I devoured most of the Rebel Blue Ranch series (next up is the enemies-to-lovers one – one of my favorite tropes!) and the Dream Harbor series last month, and the series tab is the largest by far on my TBR. This format is excellent for character development, which is one of my main requirements for really enjoying a book. This year, I’ll be diving into new series as well as re-reading some favorites. I loved Catherine Newman’s Sandwich, so I’m hyped about the follow-up. One of my book clubs is reading The Long Goodbye later this year, so I’m finally starting the Philip Marlow mysteries!  I’m re-reading Inspector Gamache this year, and I quit a few pages into the latest Thursday Murder Club because I forgot some things from previous books that I know would make it more enjoyable, so I’m re-reading those as well. Here are the ones that I’m planning for January.

Reading Challenges

So many reading challenges! My, aren’t we ambitious? I’m going back to fitting books into multiple challenges, and I’m trying to fit as many of my book club selections into them as well, so you’ll see quite a few repeats. Here goes nothing.

Anti Brain Rot Challenge

Another facet of the Anti Brain Rot Challenge is giving yourself deep-dive studies (and designing their corresponding curricula) throughout the year. I have three planned for the year, and the first is going to be learning to play the organ. I already play the piano, so it’s mostly a matter of incorporating the feet. I think. We’ll see. I’m working through an online basics course and brushing up on theory right now, but I imagine there will be several books I add to the syllabus before the end of the “semester.”

Popsugar

52 Book Club

Libro.fm

  • Christmas Days by Jeannette Winterson – Listen to an audiobook read by the author

OWC (Overeducated Women With Cats)

  • The Big Sleep by Raymond Chandler – A book that starts a series
  • Endling by Maria Reva – A book long-listed for an award (Booker Prize)
  • Enchantment by Katherine May – A nonfiction book about science or nature

BBBC (Bad Bitch Book Club)

  • This Winter by Alice Oseman – A book with a red cover (which is not the cover of the book that popped up on bookshop.org – but here is its red cover, which is super cute)

Alphabet Challenge

The goal of this one is, in this year of ‘26, to read books where either the title or the author’s name begins with each of the 26 letters of the alphabet. To add a little more spice to the challenge, I’m also going to limit it to books I own.

Read Your Bookshelf

January’s prompt is pretty easy – title includes an article. So any “a,” “an,” or “the.” Look at The Mighty Red by Louise Erdrich, fulfilling all sorts of different prompts this month!

Book Riot Read Harder

Tournament of Books

I don’t know how much I’ll participate in this one. The start date of the tournament is March 6, and it seems like it would be more fun if I had read all of them by then (and even in my woozy, ambitious New Years state of mind I know that’s not going to happen). But maybe I’ll start with these and see how it goes.

So there we are, starting off the new year with a bang! And by bang, I do mean lots of cozy nights of reading. 

2026 Resolutions

I usually post resolutions on New Years Day, but I decided not to rush it. Yesterday was nice. I got to hang out with Sarah and friends, eat some delicious food, and read a little bit. It’s hard to believe that I go back to work in less than 48 hours. Before I do, though, you know I want to share my resolutions for the year with you.

Technically I have seven (large) goals, but all of them are divided into many small steps that help me get there. 

Start Checking Off That 10-Year Bucket List

The bucket list I put together in 2025 ended up with way more than 50 things on it, and some of them are bigger goals that are going to take the whole 10 years to accomplish. Additionally, if I know me (and I do), I won’t stop dreaming up things I want to do, so the list is likely to grow over the next decade. Clearly there are more than five things I’m going to cross off that list this year. 

I’m already going to address some of them in pursuit of my financial and cozy goals (see below), but I’ve identified 11 things off the list that I want to do this year. As I’m currently looking for a new job and/or an additional income stream, the order in which they happen will depend on how fast that comes to pass, as a new job would likely have a different busy season to work around, and some of them cost a little money. But right now, this is roughly the order I’m thinking of starting them:

  • Learn to play the organ
  • Learn to play mahjong
  • Establish a consistent exercise practice
  • Join an online book club (likely MMD)
  • Join the Plot Twist Book Bar dark academia book club
  • Enjoy a personal reading retreat in a hotel with room service
  • Renew my passport
  • Write a score or a song
  • Upload an original recording to Bandcamp
  • Finish a fiction manuscript
  • Take a small town road trip

Read 200 Books

This is…lofty. But I think it’s possible. What I like about this goal is that having it in mind will remind me to give myself regular downtime, which I have a hard time remembering (shocking, I know). I am also attempting quite a few reading challenges throughout the year, and gamifying anything almost always makes it more fun for me.

Establish a Regular Journaling Practice

One thing that keeps me grounded the best is journaling. It not only helps me decompress and slow down my brain before sleep but also improves my awareness of how well I’m taking care of myself in general. 

One thing that I often put off and forget to do is journaling. I am hoping to establish a regular practice. 

Daily is ideal, but any regularity is an improvement that I will consider a success. I’m using the guided journal that accompanies Shonda Rhimes’s Year of Yes. I may decide later in the year I don’t need the prompts but for now the questions provide a good framework.

Have 100 Cozy Moments

I couldn’t figure out how to phrase this one, because it could encompass a lot of things. “Cozy moments” sounds a little woo for me, but it will have to do. 

Basically, I want to be intentional about pursuing my theme for the year. 

This may look like actually noting when moments are cozy or actively seeking them out. It may look like rearranging spaces at home, work, or elsewhere to be more welcoming. It may look like clearing out some clutter to give my brain a rest. There are many different ways this could play out, and I bet I can catalogue at least 100 of them!

Set and meet 100 small financial goals

This sounds like a lot, but it’s fewer than I met last year, so it’s doable. My focus this year (other than increasing income) is on three main things:

  • Mapping out a solid plan for retirement
  • Having a solid purpose for each savings bucket
  • Building a solid knowledge base

The keyword is solid. That’s how I want to feel about my finances at the end of the year (and have the evidence to back the feeling up).

Write 50,000 Words

For real, this time. Something tells me that finishing a fiction manuscript would be an excellent way to make this happen. 

Go on 25 Microadventures

A lot of the items on my 10-year bucket list surprised me. Apparently, I want to go places. Did not know that about myself. I’m not sure if I actually want to go places, or if I think I should want to go places.

Welp, we’re going to test it out this year with 25 small microadventures. I’m defining a microadventure as any outing that takes from an hour up to a day. It can be almost anything. It just has to include a place I’ve never been or something I’ve never done. Bonus points if it’s free. 

I may ask for suggestions later, but I have a pretty good list going already. It might be telling that this is the resolution I’m least excited about, but maybe I will be pleasantly surprised. It doesn’t hurt to try (I hope).

And there you have it. Those are the plans. It looks like a lot, but it’s mostly a continuation of things I’m already working on. It just gives them a little structure.

Cozy

From Wednesday, Season 2: “I don’t evolve; I cocoon.” 

I feel this.

Cozy seems like a fluffy word to have as a theme for the year. But it’s essential for me, and that’s becoming more apparent the older I get. 

People say you have to get out of your comfort zone to learn. And I see the merit in this reasoning.

One question, though – what’s a comfort zone? That sounds nice. Mythical. Soothing. I bet it’s just delightful.

Do neurotypical people have places and situations in which they actually feel at ease? What’s that like?!

When I think back to the last place I felt truly comfortable – no social anxiety, no worry, no counting down all the things in my head that I had to do before it was over or I could leave – I landed on the trip I took to Cape Cod with Hope and her friend Alison. 

Easy mornings where I would drink coffee and write, read, or journal. Then we’d have brunch together and do something fun for the afternoon. Then we’d all meet up again for a long, decadent dinner – sometimes just us, sometimes with guests. 

It’s the coziest week I’ve ever spent away from my own home. It left space for spontaneity in ways that I rarely experience. And it was absolute magic for my creative process.

I don’t form habits; I have rituals, and even for my favorite ones, I sometimes need some kind of reminder. For example, on Sunday, I woke up, got a few things accomplished, and then got ready for church. On the drive there, I noticed I was feeling super scattered and grumpy. And then it hit me – I had forgotten to have coffee. Yes, you read that right. Not a typo. I – the coffee snob/addict – simply did not remember to brew a cup. I knew my executive function was wonky lately but jeez. This is why I keep a to-do list posted of how to get ready in the morning. Because on days like that, when I am extra steeped in discomfort, I don’t always remember all the steps. 

[Shout-out to coworkers who always remind me to take a break and go upstairs to get coffee at work. Y’all are the best.]

I don’t necessarily even follow ambitions, although I do have a lot of them. My most lasting successes all started in a space I felt free to think and experiment – where I felt relaxed enough to be my full creative self.

I say all of this to demonstrate that learning should follow the spirit of the “out of your comfort zone” rule rather than the literal directive. Essentially, learning requires doing something different. Neurotypical people live in a world that tends to work the way their brains do and in ways they are comfortable operating. In order for their brains to form new pathways (i.e., learn), they have to jolt themselves out of that (i.e., stepping out of that comfort). For many neurodivergent people, it’s the opposite. The world does not work the way our brains do. We are already – perpetually – out of our comfort zone. Pushing ourselves further out of it is more likely to result in burnout and shutdown rather than discovery. My learning process (and I suspect this is more often true than not for most ND folk) needs a soft space to land where my overactive brain can rest well enough to focus on the new thing I’m trying to do.

I need cozy.

And it starts at home.

Making my home cozy for myself inevitably means dampening the assault on my senses. My home right now? Chaos, which reflects my state of mind in this, the yearly Wild West Week that straddles the transition between the old and new year. The chaos in my home not only reflects but also contributes to my mental chaos, though, and I’d like to work on that this year. I can’t control most of what happens outside my home, and there are many elements of rental living that are likewise beyond my grasp. I can, however:

  • Declutter and adjust lighting and decor to make my space more visibly soothing
  • Cook amazing food and clean with non-smelly products so that my first reaction to walking in isn’t a shaking of the head and an exclaimed, “Oh! What is that smell!”
  • Marie-Kondo the textures of items in my home. Even if something is useful, if my first reaction to touching it is, “Nooooo, thank you,” I will not use (or wear) it very often, which means it’s not actually helpful to me.
  • Make playlists to mask/offset the 14,351 buzzing sounds and background noises that routinely plague apartment living. Green noise is my go-to for this purpose, but I’d like to mix it up a little this year. Maybe even compose something myself.

One thing I really like about cozy as a theme is that it has an element of preparedness to it. Yes, it’s nice to make physical and psychological spaces warm and comfortable for myself and others. That alone is valuable. But the practice of doing so also prepares the space for stressful situations. For example, making my home a cozy place was useful for times when I had to stay there longer than planned (ahem, pandemic and cancer diagnosis). Paying attention to and taking care of my body not only helps me feel more at home in it but also strengthens it for dealing with health issues and other physical challenges that arise. Working so hard on my financial stability this year really came in handy when it was suddenly time to qualify for a car loan in September. Effective therapy doesn’t just help me feel better; it helps me be better.

So this year, I am cultivating coziness in my life. And I am going to cozy up to the things that matter to me. 

Cocoons may seem unimportant on the outside (and may just seem like a big blob of mindless goo on the inside). But these cozy little spaces are what help their inhabitants turn into exactly who they need to be to fly.

10 More Years!

2025. The year I finished up cancer treatments (hopefully) for good. The year my dad had a stroke. The year my Aunt Gale died. The year my friend Des died. The year I bought my first new (not used, not traded with Dad to finish out his payments on the newer model in the family – actually new with 0 miles on the odometer when I took it for a test drive) car.

The year I turned 50. 

The year I celebrated turning 50 with an excessive list of resolutions to accomplish 50 things in several categories:

  • 50 home-cooked meals
  • 50 books bought from indie bookshops
  • 50 small financial goals set and met
  • 50 thousand words written (not counting blogs or any writing I did for my day job – hey, perhaps I should have counted blogs and UNT trainings/memos/manuals!)
  • 50 bucket list items to cross off by the time I’m 60

I enjoyed working toward everything on this list, but I think my favorite part was creating the bucket list. It ranges from small errands like “renew my passport” to big-deal rites of passage like “retire from UNT.” It contains goals about my career, music, writing, finances, and health. It reveals things I want to change about my home and so many things I want to learn. It includes a surprising amount of travel. I had no idea I wanted to go so many places, but looking at the list, I can’t think of anything I’d want to remove. Although admittedly, unless I win the lottery or become otherwise inexplicably wealthy, I probably won’t be able to take all the bigger trips in just 10 years’ time. I guess that leaves me something to look forward to in my 60s!

You’ll see some of these things when I post my 2026 resolutions in a couple of days. As with a couple of the other goals, I ended up with way more than 50 things for the next decade’s to-do list, and I’m hoping to knock out a lot of the small things next year so I can start taking steps to make the longer-term goals happen. At any rate, it gives me a solid picture of how much life I still have to look forward to.

I’m excited to get started!

Before this year, I was terrified to talk about money.

Don’t get me wrong. I was responsible. I paid my bills. I had an average credit score. And to be clear, it was only merely average because I had a lot of credit card debt and a high credit utilization ratio – i.e., the amount of credit you have vs. use (if you use a lot/max out your cards, your utilization is high). And that happens to be one of the top factors that determine credit score. All my other factors were good to exceptional, even before this year.

But I still hated talking about it. And I still felt guilty about it.

Part of that is that my family is so good at managing money, and I felt bad that I wasn’t better at it.  

A bigger part of it, though, was that I’ve often taken financial literacy courses and read financial literacy books, and most of them come overcast with a large dose of shame that I don’t already know or haven’t been able to do what they’re teaching me. The prevailing message from experts is that if you are struggling, it’s because you suck at money and it’s all your fault. Because the prevailing agenda of most people who have excelled under capitalism is to uphold capitalism as the ideal at all costs. And they can’t do that if they actually admit the system doesn’t work as well as it should for everyone.

But every system has weaknesses. Every. System. *cough*especiallyAmericancapitalism*cough*

Yet that is the system where I live. So this year, I decided to face my fear. I resolved to set and meet 50 small financial goals to point me in a better direction. I met that goal by the end of May and just kept going. By committing to small, incremental changes, I have:

  • Raised my credit score by 40+ points
  • Built an emergency fund
  • Financed a car without a cosigner
  • Had some important financial discussions with my dad that I had been avoiding
  • Stopped feeling guilty about spending according to my values. In fact, I made value spending a whole budget category 

Shameless plug time – I did this with the support of Tori Dunlap’s 100K Club. This community was the real MVP when it came to getting past my financial shame and trauma so I could even think about goals. The community is not currently open, but you can get on her email list and get a lot of the same information from the resources on her website and from her book Financial Feminist (which is actually a workbook, so get your own copy or make sure you have a journal handy to write in if you borrow it from the library). 

Another resource I like is Moving Beyond Broke by Dasha Kennedy (aka @thebrokeblackgirl). If you are new to budgeting or new to saving or nervous about saving or need regular encouragement, get this book and follow her account. 

Just as important as the practical goals I met, here are some things I learned this year that I want to pass on:

  • I’m actually really great at managing money. I was good at it before this year, and I’m even better at it now. I’ve had to be, because I have never in my adult life made what was considered a livable wage for my area. And yet, I have lived. I have always had food to eat and a home to live in and managed to pay all my bills (even if sometimes the way I had to do it was credit and then find another little temp odd job to pay it off). Turns out, I can squeeze blood from a turnip.
  • As proud as I am of what I have accomplished, I did not do it alone. I have resources I can reach out to when unexpected things happen, and I have a solid community support system. This is essential. This is non-negotiable. Get yourself in community.
  • So does anyone who is financially successful. If they try to tell you their success is 100% self-made, they are either incredibly lacking in self-awareness or they are flat out lying to you.
  • If you are struggling financially and making less than $50,000 a year in most places (more in places with a high cost of living), I guarantee your struggles are not your fault. You are working your ass off in a system that was not designed for even your survival, much less your success – a system that rewards greed and treachery instead of the actual hard work it claims to reward. Let go of your shame, and get mad instead.
  • You’re probably already mad about it. Focus that mad where it’s deserved – toward the manipulative system and the greedy assholes who blindly uphold it without question – and fight back. This anger has become excellent motivation for me. Every time I want to slack in my goals or spend money on some nonsense that I don’t really want or that doesn’t match my values, I have a little voice in my head that says, “That’s how the oppressors win.” And then I make a better choice. Works like a charm.
  • Greed is rampant in our society, but if you’re actually worried about being too greedy, you’re probably not. In fact, you’re probably settling for way less than your work is worth. And by you, I do mean I. I am settling for less than my work is worth, and the financial goals I’m currently working on are to help me remedy that.
  • When I am struggling, it is easy to fall into the trap of trying to find ways to monetize the things I do that bring me joy. It is essential for my mental health and that of my community not to do this. Most things need to remain as gifts to yourself and the world around you. Cultivate generosity and protect it.

Well, that’s more than I planned to share, but hey – I’m clearly less scared of talking about money now. So that’s a win!

Well Fed in 2025

A month or two ago, I was discussing things we like to cook with a couple of coworkers, and I told them, “One of my goals this year was to try 50 new recipes.” But the more I thought about it, the more I second-guessed myself. Was that the goal?

So I just looked it up. And it turns out that my goal was just to cook myself at least 50 meals. Not new ones – just actually cook 50 times instead of grabbing drive-through or having a bowl of cereal while the groceries in the produce drawer went bad. 

And I did it!

It seems like most of the year, I really did think trying new recipes was the task at hand. But whether I cooked new things, tried a new spin on an old thing, or just relished a tried-and-true favorite, I am happy to have made myself 50 home-cooked meals. It feels good to be back in the kitchen again on a regular basis.

I even color-coded them (who is surprised? No one) on the spreadsheet to indicate whether I thought they were…

  • Great!
  • Good
  • Meh
  • Awful

I had mostly good ratings, which makes sense. I know what I like, and I pick it on purpose. I’m excited that I had so many great ratings. I also have about twice as many recipes in other columns that I want to try, so this experiment just keeps on giving.

Some of my favorites:

  • Sundried tomato alfredo on pasta with spinach and steak (pictured above) – I am going to say something controversial. Alfredo is not my favorite. I know – it seems like it would be. Cream sauce? Delicious. Cheese? Literally the best food. But almost every time I have alfredo, I am disappointed. Not this time. Turns out, I just need to dress it up a bit. This sauce came out kinda like those “marry me” sauces (i.e., marry me chicken, or the vegetarian version, marry me chickpeas), which 100% live up to the hype. Everything else fell right into place after that. 
  • Ramen stir fry or buttered cabbage and noodles – I’m combining these two because they’re the same basic concept. Forget ramen as a soup. It’s now forever a stir fry ingredient to me. This kicks fried rice’s ass. Stir fry some veggies (in oil or if it’s cabbage, replace half the oil with butter – you won’t be sorry). Garlic, onion, ginger, etc. Soy sauce or your favorite stir-fry sauce. Then toss the cooked noodles in at the last minute and you’re done.
  • Cranberry waffles – make basic waffles and throw dried cranberries (or blueberries…cherries would be nice, too) in the batter. Happy.
  • Matthew Bound’s shortcut chicken and dumplings – almost as good as my low-and-slow ones. And it really only takes 30 minutes.
  • Orzotto (or any of my pasta skillet meals, but with orzo) – make it just like risotto but with orzo. Amazing. 
  • The easiest tomato soup – I have long struggled to find a creamy tomato soup recipe that I not only loved but didn’t make me want to lie down afterward on account-a the immense amount of dairy in it. Well, here it is. A can of diced tomatoes, a bucket of cottage cheese, onion soup packet, oregano, thyme, basil, and as much water as you need to make it the consistency you want. All of these ingredients were measured with love (i.e., to taste/preference). I used my immersion blender to smooth it out, but I think it would have worked better in the big blender/bullet. Next time. And there will definitely be a next time.
  • Swamp potatoes – gross name, delicious meal. And super easy. I made mine in the crockpot but it would be just as easy (and maybe better if you crisped up the sausage a bit) on the stove. It smelled so good that one of my staff members followed me to my office to demand to know how to make it when I took the leftovers to work. It tastes as good as it smells.

There were a lot of other good meals this year, but those were the ones I will be making on a regular basis from now on. I’m pretty happy I misunderstood my own goal for so long. 

Did you discover new recipes you liked this year? Share, please!

The Bookshops of 2025

I cut most of my ties with Amazon last year. I still occasionally have to order something at work from them, and every time I tried to export my Goodreads data to StoryGraph, it crashed it, so I’m still trying to figure out how to make that work without losing that information. But I canceled Audible and Prime, and to celebrate, I wanted to spend 2025 focusing my book shopping on indie bookshops. Since this was the year I turned 50, the goal I set was to buy 50 books from independently owned bookstores. 

That’s a lot of books. Even for me. Yet I prevailed. 

I already knew 24 of them were in the bag, because I get a book a month from each of my subscriptions from Nowhere Bookshop in San Antonio. I had hoped this year to actually visit them in person (and also to see my friend Hope) but then Dad got sick, my reliable car became not so reliable, etc. The final straw that told me this year was not the time was when the weekend I wanted to go the most was the same weekend as UNT Fall Preview. Of course, it was. So I settled for supporting them from afar. But I think 2026 is our year, Nowhere! I can feel it!

Part of my plan was to also hit several of my favorite bookstores I’ve visited before on the way to or from San Antonio:

But while I still ordered a few books from Deep Vellum, actually visiting these places didn’t happen either. 

I also had plans to go to Neighbor Books in McKinney, a relatively new bookshop in their cute downtown area that looks amazing online. But we went on a Monday, and I didn’t think to check if the bookstore would be open then. It wasn’t. Womp, womp.

So where did I go? I’m so glad you asked.

  • The Plot Twist Book Bar – Denton’s romance shop where I rounded out a fairytale retelling series and my Rebel Blue Ranch collection
  • Patchouli Joe’s – a popular Denton indie where I bought several books on my birthday and then ended up later in the year joining their new fantasy book club. 
  • Magic City – took my new car for its first road trip up to Tulsa to see Travis Baldree read from his new book Brigands and Breadknives and then proceeded to buy several more books.
  • Green Feather – a little side quest in Norman on my way home from Magic City. I will definitely be going back, because it was fantastic and also there are other Norman bookshops I want to visit. It’s close enough it could probably even be a day trip.
  • The Larry McMurtry Literary Center (formerly known as Booked Up) – While I missed wandering the whole labyrinth of the building, I still found a couple of treasures and got to talk to one of the folks in charge about what they’re doing with the space. 

With a little re-routing of my original plan, it was still a successful year supporting small businesses and bookish projects. And I got a lot of really great books out of the deal, too!