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Archive for the ‘Music’ Category

Another busy week, another busy weekend. This one is going to be pretty exciting, though. Tomorrow is the dress rehearsal for our Advent/Christmas program at church, which we will present on Sunday morning. And then Sunday night, my band Wenepa is playing at Rubber Gloves at 8:30.

(I mean, it’s Chickasaw – not Cherokee – for “noise” and also we’re a quartet – not a quintet – but…close?)

I have not had a lot of focus this week (or for the last six months, but who’s counting), so I didn’t read as much as I wanted to. Here are some things I did finish/run across. Enjoy!

  • The Once and Future Witches by Alix E. Harrow – I had high hopes for this one. I had heard a lot of good things about it. But my overall impression? Meh. The storyline was okay. The characters were fine. I liked it enough to at least finish it. It just didn’t stand out. If you like historical fiction with some magic thrown in, you may enjoy it. 
  • To Fall in Love, Drink This: A Wine Writer’s Memoir by Alice Feiring – Alice Feiring is the reason I started drinking mostly organic, unfussed-around-with wines, and to this day, most of my favorites fit in this category. I tabbed so much of this book as she listed hundreds of wines to try and what she finds interesting about them. I also enjoyed the stories of her family and her career. It was a quick, informative, and fun read.
  • I want to go to all these places. 
  • I love this piece about making even mundane tasks or errands into an event. I mean, I’m not sure that I need to add another stop to errands, so I love the theme of the piece more than some of the specific details. Sign me up for at least one pasta/wine night a week at home with music and comfy clothes, though. I, too, like certain moments in that movie (Because I Said So) and that scene (as well as several other scenes…and Gabriel Macht…) for those same reasons. It looks like a good life.
  • AND OMG YAY JENNY LAWSON IS WRITING ANOTHER BOOK YAY!

I hope you have a fun and only-as-eventful-as-you-want-it-to-be weekend!

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Besides my sister, there is only one friend I grew up with about whom I can say we are even closer today than we were back then.

That friend is Sarah.

We went to school together in Childress, and we hung out at school (and outside of it, too, when I was allowed). Even then, she was perpetually cool and always up for an adventure. We had very different experiences growing up, but Sarah has always been someone who can be trusted with my hopes and dreams (even when those dreams are a romance novel I wrote in 6th grade).

(Photo credit – ? Did Stephen take this picture?)

Years went by, and we saw each other around Denton occasionally, but then she invited me to a book club at her house. A chance to reconnect – and over books?! Of course, I’m in! I’m so glad she thought to include me, because the book club is wonderful, but even more than that, because she reached out, today I get to count her among my closest friends.

One of my favorite things about Sarah is her encyclopedic knowledge of so many fascinating people and things. I loooove learning new things, and I always learn something new around her. Without Sarah, I would not know…

…what deep listening is.

…that Booked Up (RIP) ever existed or half as much about Larry McMurtry (also RIP) as I know now.

…about Julia Louis-Dreyfus’s podcast Wiser Than Me. I’ve only listened to her interviews with Jane Fonda, Isabel Allende, and Ruth Reichl (three people, by the way, who would be in my top ten most coveted interviewees if I were to host such a podcast), and I’m hooked.

…and so much more. Sarah has a way of recommending things to me that she knows I’ll love. She’s an incredible listener and has an amazing memory. I can listen to her for hours.

(Photo credit – Kara Dry)

She is the first person I performed with at a Spiderweb event. In fact, she’s the first person I performed with (outside of church, if you count that) since grad school. I love collaborating with her; I think we work together pretty well.

Sarah is generous with her knowledge, her time, her home, and her coffee.

And her pets.

She’s one of the only people who has a standing invitation to my parents’ farm “whether I come with her or not,” according to Dad.

Sarah, I love you, and I’m so proud of you and all you have accomplished. You inspire me and feed me and love me so well, and I’m lucky we’re friends.

Also – shameless plug – everyone go to Molten Plains Fest in December. This is the second year Sarah and Ernesto have organized it, and it’s going to be AMAZING.

I love you, friend, and I hope your birthday (and every day) is fantastic.

(Photo credit – Ellie Alonzo)

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Today is National Coffee Day, so I am celebrating appropriately (i.e., I am WIRED). Coffee is the scent that greets me any time I walk into my home, so it just makes good sense that today is also the day that I share other things I’ve found that help me ponder what home means to me. Enjoy!

  • I adore the whole vibe of Apartment Therapy’s guide to staying in (although I do ruffle at the idea of staying in or taking care of yourself as being “lazy.” I mean, I get that the guide is basically a long commercial for LazyBoy recliners, so they’re using the term in that context, but still). My favorite title within it is the one about the Instagram captions for your “homebody era.” I feel like homebody is more of a solid personality trait for me than an era, but it made me happy nonetheless.
  • I want to read all the books about mothers and daughters on this list. This year, I’ve been reflecting in my private journal on the family I grew up in and how that shaped me as a person. My relationship with my mother has been particularly on my mind lately. She has been having some accelerated memory loss in the last few years, and that’s been hard. The last time I was home, however, I played some hymns on our old piano, and she sat next to me the whole time, singing the alto parts she still remembers from all her years in choir. I enjoyed it so much. 
  • How badly do I want Stanley Tucci’s GreenPan line? So, so badly. Look how beautiful (and the cookware isn’t bad either).
  • One of the ways that I’m working on being at home with myself this year is learning to accept my neurospiciness as a whole, both the great and challenging parts. I’ve taken on the role of co-president of UNT’s Neurodiversity Professional Network, and we just finished reading The Neurodiverse Workplace by Victoria Honeybourne. It was so refreshing and informative. If I were the highlighter sort (I am typically not), I would have a lot of highlights in this book. The best thing I got out of it was a lot of tips on how to reframe conversations about better ways to do things in the context of customer service and universal design/practice. Also, the format of the book is visually pleasing and thus easy to read – lots of bulleted lists and checklists and a summary of the main points at the end of each chapter. I recommend it for any managers of people in general but ND folks especially.
  • I am trying to branch out with my media choices, so I started listening to Julia Louis-Dreyfus’s podcast Wiser Than Me, recommended to me by my friend Sarah. It usually takes me about 14 years to make it through a whole episode of most podcasts (audio conversation/monologue…especially when they skip around, talk over each other, or there is music or other random sounds…which happens a lot in most podcasts…challenging for me to focus), but this one seems easier to follow. The first episode is an interview with Jane Fonda, whom I love. I am inspired by the idea of consistently waking up each day and thinking about what we’re doing to make a positive mark on the world, which she talks about a bit. As podcasts go, I like this one, as I enjoy gleaning wisdom from those who are older and wiser. I think I’ll listen to more!

I hope you get a discount (or freebie) on your favorite coffee today. Have a good weekend!

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Half the office was out sick earlier this week. It was madness. I’m so tired, and despite all the work I’ve done every single second when I’m there, I still feel behind. Also, I have ingested about a vat and a half of Emergen-C. So…come at me, germs (actually, please do not come at me. Just continue staying far away, germs. That goes for you, too, allergens. Do not want.). 

But I got to go to Molten Plains on Wednesday and I get to go to cookbook club tonight in my pajamas. So the week is pretty decent overall.

  • Speaking of Molten Plains, the second Molten Plains Fest is going to be at Rubber Gloves on December 8-9. You can see a list of artists and sign up for updates here. It’s going to be amazing!
  • My friend Shadan (host of cookbook club) is writing/has mostly written a cookbook, and her publisher wants her to have a more solid social media following. Highly recommend – I’ve learned so much about food from her. Follow @shadankp on the Instagram and TikTok.
  • As is my custom every autumn, I am reflecting on my resolutions to see how far I’ve come and how much I have left to do (and also whether I still want to do them or if I’ve come up with an even better plan ). One thing that is helping me with my weekly creative goal-setting (and goal-meeting) is DIY MFA. The information on this site is solid, and it helps me organize and prioritize in a way that makes sense to my brain rather than just dumping everything into one big to-do list that never fully gets done.
  • The Booker Prize shortlist is out! I haven’t read any of these yet, but I am most excited about Sarah Bernstein’s Study for Obedience
  • Finally, I’m calling it. It’s officially Cozy Reading Season (™). If you love mysteries with lovable characters, ACF Bookens would be right up your alley. 

I hope you’ve had a good week, but even if it’s been a mess, I hope you have a wonderful weekend!

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Tomorrow is my dad’s birthday (and also Earth Day). And the phone call I make to him may be the only thing I do tomorrow. Last weekend and this week have been full of fun things, but at this moment, the keyword there is “full.” I need a day. Well, I need a month. But I get a day, and I’ll take it.

Speaking of fun things, here are a few exciting happenings that are coming up soon (like, tonight soon) and a couple of books I had feelings about.

  1. Tonight! Our duo (Sarah and I), They Say The Wind Made Them Crazy, is playing at Rubber Gloves. In fact, the whole show is going to be great. If you’re local, hope to see you there!
  2. Dr. Devon Price’s book Laziness Does Not Exist has been on my TBR for a while, so I’m delighted that this program about creating adaptable educational environments to make them more accessible is coming to UNT next week.
  3. Spiderweb is hosting an open mic night at Rubber Gloves next Tuesday. I haven’t decided if I’m going to read one of the pieces I’ve been working on or just observe, but it should be a good time.
  4. Where the Rhythm Takes You by Sarah Dass – What this main character needs is a sounding board. Someone she will actually confide in (as she already has many people she could confide in if she could put aside her pride long enough to do so). Because I wasn’t prepared for it to be me. Oh, I tried. I listened sympathetically as well as I could. Several times, I said (yes, out loud – you’re welcome, neighbors) that she should stop being clueless (you know things have to be hella obvious if even I pick up on them) and just have a conversation with the dude. Or her father. Or her best friend. Or maybe find a nice grief counselor. But alas, she could not hear me as we are both fictional in each other’s worlds. So instead, it was hours of repetitive whining about not knowing where she stood with other people, particularly the guy. I believe the audiobook reader captured the character’s voice perfectly. Unfortunately, her voice is super melodramatic, which grated on my nerve, because it’s hard to sustain constant, invested empathy, which is what seems to be expected when Every. Word. Is. Stressed.  Even when she’s just walking somewhere and sees someone in the far distance she has even the slightest twinge of beef with for any reason, it was told with Big Feelings. It is especially difficult when the character’s main conflict is her own stubborn insistence on making assumptions and thus constantly getting in her own way. It seems like I didn’t enjoy it, but I didn’t have any trouble finishing it. I did have to take a nap when it was over, though.
  5. One of Us Is Lying by Karen M. McManus – We read this YA selection for our church book club, and we all seemed to like it a lot. The plot moved along at a good, steady pace, and I found myself rooting for (almost) all of the characters. I would have five-star loved this book in junior high/high school, but it was thoroughly enjoyable even in my jaded adulthood.

What are you looking forward to the most this weekend/upcoming week?

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I’m excited about this weekend and the upcoming month. Lots of fun stuff happening in April – a couple of performances, some time with friends I haven’t seen in a while, and maybe even making some leeway on a couple of writing projects.

And books. Lots of books.

Here are three things I enjoyed and two things I’m looking forward to:

  1. Of Mess and Moxie by Jen Hatmaker – I’m a little behind the times reading this one, as her family has changed somewhat, but it still rang true and was a good read. It made me laugh and tear up, just like it was meant to. I feel like I would really like her in person, but I switched from the audiobook to the print version halfway through because I felt like she was yelling at me and it made me tired.
  2. National Poetry Month begins tomorrow, and what better way to start than with Lover by Ada Limón.
  3. Is it cheating to link you to other lists of links? Do I even care if I’m cheating? If it’s wrong, I don’t want to be right, because Toby’s list on Joy the Baker’s Let It Be Sunday post was notably fantastic this week. My favorite link was to Courtney Martin’s 10 thoughts on building a life you love. “Stay humble. Stay magical.” The comments section of Martin’s piece is pretty golden, too.
  4. Of Walking in Ice by Werner Herzog – Herzog’s journal from when he walked from Munich to Paris to visit his mentor Lotte Eisner as she was dying, with the conviction that she wouldn’t die as long as he was walking. It’s a collection of images he found along the way and his observations about the people (and the birds and the heaps of trash and the mice) he encountered. It’s a very lonely little book, and while “enjoyed” isn’t exactly the right word for how I experienced it, it is beautiful in its own way. I am glad to have read it as a witness to his journey.
  5. Tomorrow, Wenepa (my improvisational ambient noise group) is performing for KUZUthon from 5:20 (or 5:30? Anyway – later in the 5:00 hour)-5:40 (CST). The performances and interviews will be streaming on kuzu.fm, so tune in if you’re free!

I hope you have a great weekend!

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We’re all mad here.

I love costumes. I usually dress up as food (e.g., one year for Halloween, I was a strawberry milkshake), but this year, I am the Mad Hatter. It’s so much fun. The spool sash took forever but is definitely my favorite part of the outfit. One of my coworkers squeals, “You’re so cute!” every time she walks by. I enjoy that.

I can be fairly sensitive and serious, but any chance I get to insert a little whimsy into my life, I jump at it. I love opportunities to be creative, and I notice that I do better mentally when I make an effort to seek them out. To that end, I track creative tasks as part of my ongoing goal-setting for the year. This year, I have eight categories I’m tracking, and while I have specific goals for each (see parentheses below), I try to work most of them in as often as possible:

  • Writing – My writing job and blogging basically track themselves, so I limit this category to other projects, such as poetry, fiction, and newsletter or journal submissions (at least four times a week).
  • Needlework – Most of this is knitting, but I also have been playing around with embroidery and cross stitch (at least twice a week).
  • Piano – I have been working through a book of sonatas, trying to keep my sight-reading skills fresh, but I’m also (slowly) composing a piece. It’s the first song I have written since I busted out “Texas Is the Place for Me” for a piano recital when I was in junior high, but unlike that little gem, this one is strictly instrumental (at least twice a week).
  • Art journal – I have a lush-themed art journal for the year as well as an ongoing scrapbook sort of thing. I also include coloring in this because most of those pages serve as page backdrops or cover art for my various art journals (at least three times a week).
  • Cooking/baking – Is cooking creative? It is the way I do it. Also, have you seen Pie Lady Books? But even if it’s not that elaborate, I like playing around with ingredients and seeing how it turns out (at least once a week, but usually more, especially if I have several free days/evenings).
  • Collaboration – Creative tasks are even more fun with other people. Choir practice and jam sessions are typically how this pans out, but the occasional studio or art party counts, too (at least once but often twice a week).
  • Performance – I usually sing with the choir in service on Sunday mornings, but I’ve been dipping my toe into being on other stages for the last couple of years. I have a performance coming up in the next couple of weeks, so stay tuned if you’re local (at least four times a month).
  • Miscellaneous – Dang, I love a craft project. I like figuring out how to build or make things, especially if I can use them to decorate or accessorize. At any point in time, I likely have three or four projects in process, and the only reason there aren’t more is that I am limited on space (at least twice a week).

Speaking of goal tracking, I would be remiss if I did not wrap up this month of writing about creating a lush life without revealing the specific things I have been trying to put into practice on a regular basis this year. I didn’t set a specific goal number for them; I’m mostly just logging them for informational purposes. There are five main categories that I use to track lush living:

  • Cozy – Big surprise there, I know. This category is super broad. Any day that includes sufficient cozy elements (this category is also super vague) gets a check mark. Mostly, this is an opportunity to reflect at the end of each day on whether I have made time for myself to relax.
  • Pleasure/self-care – Closely related to cozy (and sometimes they do overlap), this category is more for specific self-care actions like facials and getting my hair done and foot soaks.
  • Socializing – If left to my own devices, I will hermit away and hardly ever leave the house. But several things I’ve talked about this month involve actually connecting with other people, so I give myself a little shout-out in my goal chart when I do something social.
  • Journaling – Sometimes this seems like too much navel-gazing (particularly this month when I’m also journaling daily-ish online), but it is vital to my mental health. I’m so much more grounded when I take a little time every day to write my thoughts out. My journals bounce between total stream of consciousness and well-organized, multi-tiered arguments. It’s a wild ride. I may have to appoint someone to burn them when I die.
  • Adulting – For lack of a better term. I tend to procrastinate unpleasant tasks until I am desperate to get them done. This is unnecessarily stressful and counterproductive when it comes to living a lush life. In addition to putting the week’s to-do list in my planner, I give myself credit for each task in my chart, and it’s working so well that I’m going to keep doing it next year.

And that’s the end. I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this series of posts on creating a lush life as much as I’ve enjoyed writing them. Hopefully, you found the occasional nugget that can help you make your life a little lusher, too.

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So satisfying!

It’s all well and good to create a home environment that is lush and cozy. For me, what makes decor even better is to have pieces made by beloved friends or things I’ve crafted with my own two hands. I use coloring pages to recover plain journals or as a backdrop to poetry written on scraps of paper in my art journals. All the blankets I have are either quilts made by MeMaw or Aunt Edna, throws I’ve knitted, or the large fleece blankets with knotted edges that my mom helped me make when I was sick enough to need to stay still but just well enough to be bored.

As an added bonus, a lot of the DIY craft work I do is mentally soothing.

As a writer and a musician, I am used to pouring my creativity into things you can hear. I have my favorite words, and I love exquisite phrases. I spend at least an hour a week sight-reading new pieces on the piano and practicing old favorites to keep my fingers limber. My friend Sarah has introduced me to the wonderful world of experimental sound, and the skills I continue to hone after decades of playing help me be more playful and spontaneous during improv.

One thing I have discovered in the last few years, though, is that I love being surrounded by things I’ve created that I can see or touch. I adore making my home a place that tells my unique story to anyone who walks in. Both the process and the outcome of crafting are therapeutic. It quiets my soul, and that is a very lush feeling.

I’m writing about the lush life this month.

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October is for fires and The Mummy

This weekend was the Denton Arts and Jazz Fest. There was a time when I wouldn’t have dreamed of missing it, even though until recently it was at the end of April, at the height of allergy season for me. I went every year. I would go on Friday if there was something special I wanted to see, but I was definitely there all day Saturday and at least in the evening for Brave Combo on Sunday. I just accepted that I wouldn’t really get a weekend off to reset socially, and it was worth it to me. I had a lot of fun at Jazz Fest, and I didn’t want to miss out.

I also got terribly sick at the end of each semester. I always thought it was just the stress/relief of finishing classes, but looking back, I’m not so sure. Thanksgiving through December was always busy with holiday travel and huge gatherings and shopping (and it was before the internet, so it was all in person *shudders*) and the local tree lighting festival, and the end of the spring semester was banquets and graduations and Jazz Fest. After I finished my last final (or, once I started teaching, handed in my grades), I took a breath and paused for a moment, and that was my body’s cue to shut down for about a week. I was alarmed the first couple of times it happened, but then I just accepted it.

I’ve learned how to avoid it now, but it does come at a price.

I need a lot of alone time. My specific concoction of introverted, socially anxious, sensory sensitive, and whatever else happens to be going on requires a certain amount of downtime to regroup, or I will get sick. It takes me a couple of hours every night to wind down, and I need at least two nights off a week when I just come home and decompress. It’s also imperative that I have at least two consecutive days a month in which I come home the night before the first day and don’t leave again until the morning after the second. Ideally, at least one weekend will be free for this to happen, but if not, I know I will need to take the appropriate amount of time off work to ensure that it does. To really thrive, I need more alone time than I’ve described here, but that’s the minimum. If I want to stay well, it’s not optional.

I suspect there are a lot of people for whom a great amount of solitude is necessary. I just don’t hear a lot of them talk about it. Maybe we’ve been taught to be ashamed that we can’t handle that much stimulation all the time without any real breaks like others seem to be able to. If that’s you, and no one has told you this yet, let me state clearly – there’s nothing wrong with you. Taking care of yourself is the right, responsible thing to do. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

I had hoped to go to Jazz Fest this weekend. One of the students I work with performed, and so did one of my friends’ bands that I haven’t seen in a long time. The original Blues Brothers band was there, and I always like looking at the booths (especially the jewelry) and camping out in front of the UNT stage on Sunday afternoon. Judging by the pictures on social media, I would have seen a lot of people I know and had a good time. I’m a little sad to have missed it.

But our cookbook club had a murder mystery dinner on Friday. We got to dress up and play catty characters. So much fun! And I spent last night jamming with some friends I get to perform with in November. This morning I went to church. I really like the study we’re doing now, and I got to sing in the choir. And tonight I sat by the fire with Spiderweb friends and watched (most of) The Mummy. It was a full, busy, lovely weekend that still left me with the large blocks of alone time I need to be ready for this week.

Sometimes it’s ok to miss good things. Lush life doesn’t mean you have to pack every waking moment with activities you love and force it all to fit. It means learning when not to.

I’m unpacking what I’m learning about living a lush life this month.

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My favorite part of this picture is the reflection of the sheet music in the black keys.

Other than the benefits and the frequent free food, one reason I stay at my full-time job is that I will be officially eligible to retire on August 1, 2030. That’s just eight years away (or seven years, nine months, and 27 days, but who’s counting). Assuming I am in a good financial position to do so at that point, this will allow me to dedicate significantly more time to what I actually want to be when/as I grow up.

An artist.

More specifically, a writer/musician/dancer, but I’m open to other forms of art. The relatively small amount of time I spend working on my works in progress, writing this blog, collaborating with Sarah and other friends, singing in the choir, and other artsy pursuits is what makes me come alive. It is my joy. Retiring this early will also afford me some flexibility in my schedule for attending performances (as well as performing in them) because there will be no office to report to the next morning. I can finally fully embrace the night owl I was born to be.

One of the most challenging realizations I’ve had this year while pondering what it means to live lushly is that doing a job that is consistent but doesn’t really allow me to use my strengths or do what I enjoy puts inherent limits on how much of such a life I can really have right now. Is it worth it? Is there something else I could be doing that would be more rewarding and still give me the stability I currently need? I don’t have answers to these questions yet, but the questions have prompted me to look for ways to incorporate my creative skills into the work I do and to be pickier about the things I volunteer for that don’t really fit my preferences.

At the very least, engaging in creative activities gives me something to look forward to, even if it’s not how I spend most of my time. I’m excited to go to choir practice tonight. And after taking a few years off, I signed up for NaNoWriMo next month. I’m going to try writing my novel in second person. That’s about as far into planning as I’ve gotten, which is actually good for this particular time frame because I write a lot faster as a pantser than a planner.

I’m writing about the lush life this month.

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