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Archive for the ‘Joy’ Category

I love transitional periods. This fondness makes today one of my favorite days of the year. The short last day of work before the break that starts another transitional period between the year we are finishing and the year ahead. Other than the time surrounding my birthday, this is usually my very favorite week.

It’s also joy season.

I mean, joy is for always. But I am paying particular attention to it these days, trying to find it wherever and whenever I can. I love this piece by Dr. Chanequa Walker-Barnes where she shares her secret for finding joy, especially this quote: “I cultivate joy as a discipline, attentive to finding it in life’s everyday moments, determined to ride this thing until the wheels fall off. In a death-dealing culture, joy is a form of resistance. I am decidedly oppositional in my joy.”

Seeing joy as resistance to the junk of the world is a nice motivation to pursue it more assertively.

Here are some ways I plan to do that over my break from work:

  • Spending quality time with family and friends
  • Making art (writing, music, baking, crafts, etc.)
  • Reading for long, luxurious stretches of time
  • Cleaning out the parts of my apartment that seem cluttered to make them cozy and functional again
  • Unraveling my year and preparing for the new one

I hope you have a wonderful weekend, friends!

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“One doesn’t need magic if one knows enough stories.”

“I was delighted to sit in the corner with my food and a book and speak to no one.”

Heather Fawcett, Emily Wilde’s Encyclopaedia of Faeries

This past weekend, I participated (loosely) in Dewey’s 24-hour Readathon. The official time was 8 a.m. Saturday to 8 a.m. Sunday (EST). But I (and various others in the Discord and in the Facebook group) rarely actually stick to the time of the event. My goal, for example, was to simply read a collective 24 hours. I think the Dewey’s team is on to us – instead of hourly challenges, they just listed a handful of challenges to complete “at any time during the readathon.”

I completed no challenges.

I didn’t read a full 24 hours.

I barely remembered to post the picture of the stack I was choosing from (see above) on the group’s social media pages.

I carried on with plans to attend my favorite yearly Halloween party and Spiderdead, brazenly cutting into the hours I would usually set aside on readathon weekends to read.

I finished three books, but only one of them is actually in this stack (Fang Fiction – pretty cute!).

What I got out of the readathon was still pretty magical.

I got to tuck into stories about found families and books and several other favorite themes. I ate good, simple food, so I rested better (weird how that happens) and thus felt more refreshed when the weekend was over (despite it being a “busy” one). I embraced my full homebody self without the usual twinge of guilt about what a person who lives alone should want to do on the weekend.

These twinges are getting smaller and less frequent as I age. One reason for this is that I’m accepting who I am more and becoming less apologetic about it with each passing month. Another reason is that I get so much joy and restoration out of my alone time that there is little to no room left for feeling bad about it.

At any rate, I had a great weekend, and I look forward to many more like it as the season changes.

Reading more makes me want to write more. I’m reflecting on my reading this year.

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“My bucket list of little things aims to live every moment as if it’s my first. To find the glory in what a seasoned eye might falsely consider mundane.”
Andrea Gibson, Things That Don’t Suck (Substack)

It has been a long week. Nothing particularly bad has happened. I’ve just felt puny and tired. The weather, however, is gorgeous. It was 52 when I left home. I am wearing a light sweater!

Today, I need a list of things to look forward to this season that aren’t super ambitious but still give me ways to ground myself and remind myself that I’m alive and meant to be living and not just muddling through.

  • Buy a delicious cup of coffee and drink it while browsing a bookstore. Take all the time I want.
  • Take shorter, more frequent walks. Not everything has to be hard all at once. A little bit multiple times a day is better than pushing myself and getting too exhausted to do anything else for hours.
  • Keep my hands warm and nimble with piano and knitting.
  • Make soup without rushing. Pan roast the veggies slowly. Add one ingredient at a time. Fill my home with cozy smells.
  • Take drives. Drive down winding country roads just outside of town and find the few trees in Texas that know what time of year it is. Drive down my favorite streets and let the memories of every time I’ve been there before flow over me.

This is what I want my season to look like.

What are you looking forward to this fall?

Reflecting on reading this month (and hopefully beyond).

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“He doesn’t say what he is thinking, which is that his church is held-breath story listening and late-night-concert ear-ringing rapture and perfect-boss fight-button pressing. That his religion is buried in the silence of freshly fallen snow, in a carefully crafted cocktail, in between the pages of a book somewhere after the beginning but before the ending.”
Erin Morgenstern, The Starless Sea

The Starless Sea is one of my favorite books I’ve read this year. I love everything about it. The storyline is intricate and the characters are well-developed. It is full of mystery and surprise, and it doesn’t shy away from darker emotions.

Most of all, though, it resonates with me through little moments like this one. There is almost a holiness to the language, conjuring images and sensations that stir my soul.

I’m having a hard time putting this reflection into words. It’s something like church, though. I am a rarity among my friends in that I do actually attend church, and I find the sacred there. The care and love of a community. The big picture.

One of my favorite aspects of my faith, however, is that the divine isn’t confined to a building or a specific group of people. It’s in a million little things, like wind chimes and cloud formations. Kindness. A really good cup of coffee. A dish of water set out for the birds.

This quote reminds me of moments that make up a whole life.

I’m reflecting on my reading this month.

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This week was a lot. First week back to work after surgery, and it went pretty well. We had two Freshman Orientation sessions this week, so our team was running around everywhere between tabling, talking to parents, giving tours, and answering the phone that kept ringing off the hook. And next week’s schedule looks the same.

So this weekend is all about relaxing! I’m gonna DoorDash some dinner tonight (and maybe breakfast tomorrow, too) and read to my heart’s content. Well, read until I fall asleep. I am not sure there are enough hours ever to fully reach my heart’s content when it comes to reading.

Links for this week:

  • I finally broke down and started a GoFundMe for my medical expenses after learning how much I would have to pay out of pocket for my upcoming radiation treatments. But this is the last major phase of treatment – it’s all just ongoing prevention and checkups after that!
  • I’m very excited for my friend Andi who recently signed a contract with a publisher for all her books! I also really like her YouTube channel.
  • Lessons in Chemistry is one of my favorite books I’ve read in the last few years. Easily top five. This interview with author Bonnie Garmus makes me love it even more. Success really is the best revenge.
  • Welp, I did it. I subscribed to Archer and Olive, and I just got the notification that my June box was delivered. So I have that to look forward to later this evening!
  • Finally, I love the Quiet Life community Susan Cain has created, and one of the neatest things they do is the community art project.

I hope you have a great weekend!

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Since October’s blog was full of foodie joy, today I’m sharing a few of the other things I read last month with you. Some magical cozies and books about spooky houses or other scary things. 

  • The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches by Sangu Mandanna – I loved this book. So many people recommended it to me, and it did not disappoint. It’s a cozy fantasy in which the main character is a witch who gets hired to train three young witches. Except she was raised to believe it was dangerous for witches to be together for long periods of time, so as you can imagine, some angst ensues. It’s not just a cute story, though. It’s also a wonderful treatise on the residual effects of chronic loneliness and one of the best explanations of the difference between “nice” and “kind” (spoiler – kind is far better) that I’ve ever read.
  • Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia – I liked this book a lot. I think there could have been more buildup in the beginning, but it was a great concept and solid execution. I love any book where the house or the place itself acts as one of the characters, and this story did not disappoint in that regard. 
  • The Book Woman’s Daughter by Kim Michele Richardson – I was introduced to the original book woman and the Blue People of Kentucky in the first book of this series (duology?). This is why I love my book clubs. I probably would not have picked either of these books up on my own, but because someone recommended them for discussion, I got to read them and learn something new. This book started a little slower for me than the last one, but it was still an enjoyable read.
  • The Enchanted Hacienda by J.C. Cervantes – Jenny Lawson was right. It really was like Encanto and Practical Magic had a baby. I loved this story and the way family connections were woven together. There were enough surprises that it kept me interested, but nothing particularly stressful or jarring. Just what I needed last month. I thoroughly enjoyed this book and look forward to reading more from this author.
  • Holly Horror by Michelle Jabès Corpora – I ordered this book because I grew up with Holly Hobbie accessories for my room – my first bedspread was Holly Hobbie themed, and I had a tea set as well. The quilt that my Great Aunt Edna made me that I still use today has a Holly Hobbie-esque pattern. This story is a dark twist on the character, turning her into a girl who mysteriously disappeared years ago and now haunts her old house. I enjoyed the descriptions and the way the author introduced all the essential characters. I will definitely read the next in the series!

And finally, I offer you this excerpt from Samantha Irby’s new collection of essays, Quietly Hostile. When someone rains on your parade or tries to grade your taste, a simple “I like it!” is indeed a sufficient response. When you find joy – wherever you find it – in this world, it’s yours. You get to have it, even if you can’t articulate exactly why you like it (or, frankly, just don’t want to explain). 

I hope you get to do a lot of things you like this weekend!

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I imagine most of us have those certain foods we love that would make others recoil in horror. Do yourself a favor – DO NOT google “gross foods” to come up with examples. If you must, satisfy your curiosity with this link but also don’t click on that if you don’t want to see some questionable and possibly revolting things (and I only say “possibly” because I recognize that what I might find revolting others don’t, because that list got a lot of yucks from me).

I mean, you do you, but I’m not eating anything that starts with “jellied” and ends with some animal part.

I will absolutely chow down on some chicharrones (aka, pork rinds), though. When the dining hall across the street from my office made them, I was delighted. They remind me of afternoons at my grandparents’ apartment. Mom stopped by several times a week to visit with her mother, and Granddaddy spent most of the time singing Marty Robbins along with his record player in the back room. And these salty snacks were readily available. One of my earliest memories with this set of grandparents was discovering that Smoky the cat really liked them, too.

Jello salads are also on my list of foods I generally enjoy that others often have on their iffy lists. This is another perk of holidays and potlucks – there’s always at least one of them. My absolute favorite is a lime green one with pineapple and cottage cheese (another food people seem to have very strong opinions about). I don’t even mind that it has pecans in it, but I prefer it without them. *sigh* It’s been so long since I had this treat. I may have to make some before the year is over.

I also really crave hot dogs every once in a while, as long as I don’t think too much about what they’re made of.

Most of the foods I love that others side-eye are ones that are strongly tied to memories of home and comfort, and I suspect that’s the same for most people. If I were to survey the folks in my office, we’d get nostalgic gushing about pickle loaf, hot Cheetos with bananas and milk, sucking the heads of crawdads, and various other dubious pairings and practices that, despite all odds, bring them joy. I may not be interested in trying (or reliving) them myself, but I like listening to others rave about their favorite things.

Speaking of suspect snacks, I think I’ll go see what I can find in the vending machine next door.

I’m writing about all kinds of foods – the good, the bad, and the ugly – that remind me of home this month.

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Day 22 – Potlucks

I grew up Baptist, so I’ve definitely attended my share (and about 14 other people’s share) of potlucks. Any chance the church folk had to gather and share a meal, they jumped at it. They usually tried to fit it into some sort of holiday or celebration, but if the hostess committee (yes, that’s what it was called) felt we had gone too long without one, we’d see an announcement in the bulletin inviting everyone to bring their favorite dish to share in the next week or two.

I act like it wasn’t glorious, but it was. Casseroles as far as the eye could see, various things made in slow cookers, fried chicken, all manner of potatoes made every way you could imagine, things called “salad” that were definitely more dessert than the healthy side the term implies, and someone always made deviled eggs.

The church I attend now can also bring it with the potluck spread. Casseroles, charcuterie boards, and so many desserts. We have vegan and vegetarian options, and occasionally someone brings beer (because Lutherans). And because many of our congregants have lived in New Mexico at some point, there is usually at least one dish featuring the hatch green chile or some other pepper.

The most common potlucks I attend these days are our monthly cookbook club nights. We often have a theme (and, as one of the members pointed out, the theme is often “orange” because we really, really love cheese). Friday’s theme, for example, was spooky foods. We had:

  • Jack o’lantern sweet potato fries on the side of matching falafel burgers
  • Jack o’lantern pizza
  • Mummy hot dogs
  • Ghoul-ash (my contribution)
  • Pumpkin cake (and yes, the stem was a rice krispie treat)

I learned a lot from the way I grew up. Much of it, I’ve had to unlearn (and then relearn some things…). But one of the things I value the most is the importance of gathering around the table to share a meal and some conversation. Taking the time to eat some good food and have a good talk. Most of the people I know the best and love the most are those who have fed me or have allowed me to feed them. Linking food and friendship – I come by it honest.

I’m writing about how food has shaped my life, my relationships, and my sense of home this month.

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I love having a free day. I was off work today, and my car is fixed, and I had cookbook club tonight, and it was just a great day.

Here are some foodie things I enjoyed reading this week.

  • And we’re right out of the gate with some controversy, but I really need to get something off my chest. Sweet potato pie is superior to pumpkin pie. Discuss if you must, but I said what I said.
  • We had a whole discussion about favorite holiday foods and favorite sides at staff. There were divisions, alliances were formed, shots almost fired. It was glorious. Best staff meeting ever. In related news, I need cranberry salsa in my life. 
  • When I find a foodie book I really love, I often re-read it. In fact, of all the genres, foodie memoir or fiction is what I’m most likely to re-read. We are discussing Lessons in Chemistry in a book club at work on Monday, so I’m listening to it again this weekend. It may be my favorite book I’ve read this year. It’s so good. I’m also re-reading Love, Loss, and What We Ate by Padma Lakshmi, and I love it just as much as I did the first time. The stories people tell about food, its place in their lives, and its impact on culture are meaningful to me. It’s one of my favorite ways to get to know someone.
  • The Modern Proper: Simple Dinners for Every Day by Holly Erickson and Natalie Mortimer – I adored this cookbook from the beginning when one of the authors was talking about her grandma teaching her the “proper” way to dice. What little culinary education I gleaned during childhood was learning the proper way (i.e., Mom’s way) to do something. My mom and I once had an argument because I was adding water to the pie crust recipe wrong (my point was that I had seen several bakers doing it a different way and their pies turned out ok…to which she responded “But they weren’t baking in my kitchen.” Welp, they sure weren’t. She had me there.). Conversations like this one were why, while most of my formative memories of food stem from the place I grew up, most of my actual cooking skills were developed when I had a kitchen of my own. Like the authors of this cookbook, I have great memories of observing Mom, Aunt Gale, MeMaw, and (later in adulthood) Dad in the kitchen, but my workable knowledge is the result of experimenting and creating my own sense of the proper ways to do things. It’s how I learned that the way I add water to a pie crust is just fine and also that if you replace half the water with vodka (or gin), you get a flakier crust (the dough puffs as the alcohol evaporates). Sometimes learning new ways to do things is good.
  • And this has absolutely nothing to do with food, but it has everything to do with home, and also I love Jenny Lawson, and maybe someone here might benefit from reading it, and plus…I do what I want. Actually, looking at the drawing, I can picture myself curled up in a blanket, drinking something warm and eating something comforting in that little house. So it IS sort of food-related after all (if you really want it to be). Read all the way to my favorite line at the end – “Sometimes the mistakes are beautiful. Just like you.”

I hope you have a wonderful weekend, and I hope you’re enjoying this series on the food that reminds me of home this month!

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Food tells the story of place. As I’ve been reflecting on the concept of home this year, I have been delighted to discover how many memories and experiences that mean home to me come with a menu. I (and a lot of the important people in my life) echo Julia Child’s sentiment – “People who love to eat are always the best people.” The scents, the tastes, the ambiance created around a table full of friends and/or family – I’m not sure I could really explore what it means to be at home without talking about these things.

While the bulk of the actual writing for this series will all happen this month, I’ve been outlining these posts since June. I’ve had a lot of fun revisiting old recipes and seeing if they taste the same as I remember. I’ve also found a lot of joy in reading cookbooks, food memoirs, and foodie fiction to find new things to try (my favorites of which I will showcase during Friday Fives).

Full disclosure – this may read like a food blog this month. I am pretty stoked about that myself, as I looove food blogs. When a person generously shares the food they love with the internet, I don’t just want the recipe. I do want to hear the story behind their favorite soup and the beloved person it reminds them of. Or, at the very least, I want to hear what makes their particular spin on lasagne noteworthy. I want to know the special place this dish holds in their life. If you want that, too, then you’re going to love this series. 

I also invite you to share any stories in the comments that come to mind when you read the posts. I want to hear which foods have impacted your life. And if you have some recipe (restaurant, cookbook, etc.) that you think I really must try, I am all ears!

[Aside: if you’re one of those food blog haters who just want the recipes without having to endure the arduous struggle of scrolling to the end to get to them, this may not be your favorite month on my blog. See you in November.]

If you’ve been here a while, you know how my 31-days projects work. I’ll post something new every day and index the links here. Enjoy!

Day 2 – Foodie TBR
Day 3 – Weekly Cooking Rhythms
Day 4 – The Family Coolers
Day 5 – Dad and His Grill
Day 6 – The First Friday Five
Day 7 – On Telling MeMaw Your Favorite
Day 8 – Holidays With the Family
Day 9 – Holiday Candies
Day 10 – My Love of Cranberry Sauce
Day 11 – Breakfast and Brunch
Day 12 – What I Want in a Restaurant
Day 13 – Friday Five – In Praise of Perfect Evenings
Day 14 – Sauces
Day 15 – Baking Season
Day 16 – Soup Season
Day 17 – Spice of Life
Day 18 – Cereal and Snack Cakes
Day 19 – Salads
Day 20 – Free Friday Five
Day 21 – My Charcuterie Journey
Day 22 – Potlucks
Days 23 & 24 – A Warm Beverage
Day 25 – Sandwiches
Day 26 – Gross Things That Make Me Happy
Day 27 – The Last Friday Five of the Series
Days 28 & 29 – Favorite Takeout
(Day 30 – skipped)
Day 31 – The Paprikash (Month in Review)




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