Another busy week, another busy weekend. This one is going to be pretty exciting, though. Tomorrow is the dress rehearsal for our Advent/Christmas program at church, which we will present on Sunday morning. And then Sunday night, my band Wenepa is playing at Rubber Gloves at 8:30.
(I mean, it’s Chickasaw – not Cherokee – for “noise” and also we’re a quartet – not a quintet – but…close?)
I have not had a lot of focus this week (or for the last six months, but who’s counting), so I didn’t read as much as I wanted to. Here are some things I did finish/run across. Enjoy!
The Once and Future Witches by Alix E. Harrow – I had high hopes for this one. I had heard a lot of good things about it. But my overall impression? Meh. The storyline was okay. The characters were fine. I liked it enough to at least finish it. It just didn’t stand out. If you like historical fiction with some magic thrown in, you may enjoy it.
To Fall in Love, Drink This: A Wine Writer’s Memoir by Alice Feiring – Alice Feiring is the reason I started drinking mostly organic, unfussed-around-with wines, and to this day, most of my favorites fit in this category. I tabbed so much of this book as she listed hundreds of wines to try and what she finds interesting about them. I also enjoyed the stories of her family and her career. It was a quick, informative, and fun read.
I love this piece about making even mundane tasks or errands into an event. I mean, I’m not sure that I need to add another stop to errands, so I love the theme of the piece more than some of the specific details. Sign me up for at least one pasta/wine night a week at home with music and comfy clothes, though. I, too, like certain moments in that movie (Because I Said So) and that scene (as well as several other scenes…and Gabriel Macht…) for those same reasons. It looks like a good life.
But I did narrow it down to five books. And they’re (for the most part) in slightly different genres.
So there’s that.
When I am choosing the “best books” I have read in any given year, I may not be selecting ones that had the best writing (although all of these are well-written) or were the most profound (although all of these definitely had those moments). The sole factors that determine my decision are:
Did I love reading it?
Did I get something meaningful (possibly even life-changing) out of it?
And out of all the books I’ve read so far this year, these five meet those two criteria the best.
Here For It: Or, How To Save Your Soul in America by R. Eric Thomas – Kind and funny and charming. My favorite parts were the ones in which he talked about his wrestling with faith and identity and how that plays out.
Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner – As my parents age, I am more drawn to stories about loss and grief, and this was a gorgeous memoir that explored both as well as the food that reminds her of her mother.
This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone – Is it a love story? Is it fantasy? Is it science fiction? Yes. In all the best ways.
Legends and Lattes by Travis Baldree – This book made me fall in love with cozy fantasy. I’ve already put the second one on hold at the library.
A few things that are available to peruse for those who need to take a break in my office. Just a little light reading.
I love December and also am already tired of December. There are so many things that I really enjoy happening. But also…there are so many things. This month is Advent, the end of the semester, the start of Christmas, and the end of the year all in one. There are evaluations, interviews, EOY reports, etc., due. There are parties and reviews and the tying up of all manner of loose ends. Also, don’t forget joy and magic and miracles (oh my).
I’m reading Silence and Other Surprising Invitations of Advent by Enuma Okoro throughout the month, but I’m also combining finishing up my reading goal with my Advent calendar. I use little knitted pockets on my tree to store prompts, and this year, they’re reading prompts. I’ll pick one, read a book that fits the category, and then go to the next one. The categories include things like:
Christmas themed
Next in a series
Features a talking animal
Single word title
They also include practical things like:
Next book due at the library
Girlxoxo challenge
Alphabet challenge
Book club selection
If this goes as planned, I will finish my reading goal by the skin of my teeth. Even if nothing goes as planned, though, I still have an exciting reading (etc.) month ahead, and I hope you have a wonderful December regardless of how you spend it!
I grew up Baptist, so I’ve definitely attended my share (and about 14 other people’s share) of potlucks. Any chance the church folk had to gather and share a meal, they jumped at it. They usually tried to fit it into some sort of holiday or celebration, but if the hostess committee (yes, that’s what it was called) felt we had gone too long without one, we’d see an announcement in the bulletin inviting everyone to bring their favorite dish to share in the next week or two.
I act like it wasn’t glorious, but it was. Casseroles as far as the eye could see, various things made in slow cookers, fried chicken, all manner of potatoes made every way you could imagine, things called “salad” that were definitely more dessert than the healthy side the term implies, and someone always made deviled eggs.
The church I attend now can also bring it with the potluck spread. Casseroles, charcuterie boards, and so many desserts. We have vegan and vegetarian options, and occasionally someone brings beer (because Lutherans). And because many of our congregants have lived in New Mexico at some point, there is usually at least one dish featuring the hatch green chile or some other pepper.
The most common potlucks I attend these days are our monthly cookbook club nights. We often have a theme (and, as one of the members pointed out, the theme is often “orange” because we really, really love cheese). Friday’s theme, for example, was spooky foods. We had:
Jack o’lantern sweet potato fries on the side of matching falafel burgers
Jack o’lantern pizza
Mummy hot dogs
Ghoul-ash (my contribution)
Pumpkin cake (and yes, the stem was a rice krispie treat)
I learned a lot from the way I grew up. Much of it, I’ve had to unlearn (and then relearn some things…). But one of the things I value the most is the importance of gathering around the table to share a meal and some conversation. Taking the time to eat some good food and have a good talk. Most of the people I know the best and love the most are those who have fed me or have allowed me to feed them. Linking food and friendship – I come by it honest.
I’m so happy it’s Friday. I’ll be even happier when tomorrow is over, because it’s UNT Fall Preview Day, and we are in for a long, busy day. I’m going to have to move comfort food night to tomorrow and sleep in on Sunday.
But right now, it’s 8:00 on Friday night. I’m on my second glass of wine, after having watched a couple of Gilmore Girls eps and eaten a mountain of popcorn, air-popped and then lightly buttered and salted. Today was hectic, and tomorrow will be…whatever it will be…and I am without a working vehicle at the moment…but tonight I don’t have anywhere to be or anything pressing to do, and the wine is good. I’m having the perfect evening.
Here are some foodie things I enjoyed this week:
How To Read a Recipe (Joy the Baker) – I appreciate it any time someone breaks a process down that, on the surface, seems like a no-brainer. Turns out, very few things are no-brainers. I need my brain for most things, including reading a recipe. As always, Joy’s advice is spot on and useful and touches on things that are not immediately obvious to me, even as someone who has been successfully reading and using recipes for decades. And there are other things that are so immediately obvious to me that I do them without consciously thinking of it, and thus forget that other people haven’t learned that yet, which is good to keep in mind when writing my own recipes.
My friend Shadan, leader and host of our cookbook club, has a cookbook coming out soon. If you want a sneak peak of the kind of delicious things you can expect when you buy it, check out her new blog!
The Comfort Food Diaries: My Quest for the Perfect Dish To Mend a Broken Heart by Emily Nunn – I am listening to the audio, but I think I would have enjoyed the print version more. In fact, I feel like that’s a theme with foodie books, especially if they have recipes. It’s also possible that this is a busy month full of many expected and also unexpected stressors, and thus the ability to focus that usually helps with reading via audio is just not there. Anyway, I am enjoying the book so far. She’s telling a lot of stories about how her friends and family rallied around her during a rough time and what she ate, so it’s right up my alley.
Equal Exchange chocolates are among my favorites. Support small farmers and get great treats for Halloween. [This is not a paid advertisement; I just really, really love them.] Speaking of great things to support this weekend, our annual Empty Bowls fundraiser is tomorrow. For the price of a ticket, you get all the soup you can eat and get to pick out a handmade bowl crafted by a local artisan. And you can even buy tickets at the door. If you’re local (Denton), go to Harvest House tomorrow any time from 12p-2p, and tell them I wish I was there.
And finally – I’m staying home all day Sunday to recuperate from this week. I’m going to make a big mess of pasta, maybe some soup. Maybe I’ll take a long walk to the library (the branch I go to is almost exactly two miles from me) to pick up the books I have on reserve. Or maybe I’ll just read what I have here and watch more episodes of The Bear. Or more Gilmore Girls, with their diner and their chef and their Friday night dinners. Even the fictional characters I love are obsessed with food.
I hope your weekend is restful and good, and I hope you eat something wonderful.
It’s my mom’s birthday! She is officially an octogenarian! She’ll be so excited that I told the internet that.
And happy Good Friday to those who observe. Although…is “happy” the right adjective there? Happy death of our Lord? Yay, crucifixion? Congratulations on the commemoration of Jesus being murdered by the state under pressure from an angry mob?
ANYWAY.
Hi. It is Friday – the end of the work week – and that is something to be happy about.
I never know what to take for Easter brunch at church. Side dish? Breakfast casserole? Something I can make the day before? Nothing but a healthy appetite because I already am going to be there as assisting minister at the 8:30 service and contrary to my personal feelings/raising, I don’t actually have to do everything? Heavily leaning toward the last one, but have not completely ruled out blueberry monkey bread as an option.
I am enjoying Camp NaNoWriMo. I’m working on my essay collection of to-do lists for complicated days. I set a goal of 10,000 words for the month, which averages out to a little less than 350 per day. Totally doable.
Firekeeper’s Daughter by Angeline Boulley – This book was so good. I listened to the audio, but I may buy the hard copy because I can see myself re-reading it. What most stood out to me was the perfect pacing – it was fast enough to hold tension and keep the story moving but slow enough to build suspense. It felt like it was happening in real time.
Weyward by Emilia Hart – I liked this one a lot. It was just the right mix of dangerous and cozy. The book follows three generations of women who have a specific power, and the way they use it is quite satisfying. The audio reader was great – she made it super easy to distinguish between the three characters telling the story.
As I’m pondering ways to make my apartment cozier (i.e., stuff more bookshelves and reading nooks in there), I often stumble across lists like this one. My current project is figuring out a way to divide the living room and dining area without making it feel cramped. I am considering getting rid of the big table. Maybe. I’m going to move things around and see how they work.
I hope you are having a good day and have an even better weekend!
One thing I really love about this month is that my birthday is on its way, so I get a lot of emails with coupons and freebies. I will faithfully delete countless emails I don’t read all year just to get these treats.
Here are some other things I have loved recently:
Birds of America by Lorrie Moore – This was our February selection for Follow the Reader, and we spent most of the time talking about it just reading exquisitely written lines from the stories. My favorite story was a tie between “Which Is More Than I Can Say About Some People” about the narrator’s trip to Ireland with her mom and “Terrific Mother” set in a children’s cancer ward. Moore writes deeply flawed characters really well, and each story elicited a strong emotional response.
A Hole in the World by Amanda Held Opelt – Opelt’s own experience of grief after her miscarriages and the sudden loss of her sister (Rachel Held Evans) led to her desire to learn about grief rituals, and this book is the result of what she learned. It sits in the uncertainty of having more questions than answers and cycling through both grief and joy (sometimes at the same time). It was the perfect read for Lent, and I can see myself buying and re-reading it when grief is heavy.
I’m in the market for new sandals. The weather has been springy, and the selection in my closet is sparse. I am considering these or these. Maybe these. I tend to lean toward black footwear (practical – hides dirt, goes with everything), but I’m feeling shiny lately. I may need shoes to match. Thanks for the birthday coupon, DSW!
I need another baking pan like I need a hole in my toe, but THIS IS SO CUTE. I COULD MAKE BUTTERFLY CAKELETS. Now, whether I would is another story…
[Not really related – just happy treats I forgot I had and found at my desk this morning.]
Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent, is this week.
I have observed Lent since my early 20s, long before I was a member of a liturgical church that celebrates in seasons. I’ve practiced fasting from certain foods and activities, reading a book or study designed for the season, committing to certain service projects for 40 days, etc. I particularly love this piece from Tsh Oxenreider on why Lent is good for us. All of the ways I have observed Lent have been meaningful for me in some way, and I’m glad for the experience.
Being a part of a church that actively observes the season, though, makes my focus more communal and less personal, which is also nice. We have weekly soup suppers together and a mid-week service. For a couple of the years I’ve been part of this church, the communal observance was all I did, and it was enough.
With home as my theme for this year, a personal observance also seems in order. Part of the way I’m doing that this season is by checking in with ongoing goals, figuring out what’s working and what’s not, and adjusting as needed. This, of course, is a helpful practice in reaching long-term goals regardless of your religious leanings.
Incorporating the solitude that I need with the life that I want is sometimes messy. February has been intense but good. I’ve been a part of three performances this month. Three! I think that’s more times than I performed in all of 2022. And I have at least two more performances coming up in April that I’m excited about.
I like performing, and I want to keep doing it, but that means adjusting in other areas so that I don’t burn out. I’ve had to be extra vigilant about safeguarding my alone time, and I’ve had to be very strict with myself about boundaries between work and personal life. The time-outs have been useful because with so many performances comes extra practice and before I know it, I’m out of clean socks or spoons. Or worse – coffee.
So some of my short-term goals for Lent are about continuing with this year’s focus and resolutions, which were intentionally designed to help me find a good balance between all the things I need and want to do so that nothing gets too far off track. Specifically….
Two extended time-outs a week – This resolution (taking one long break a week) is going so well. It’s the primary reason I was able to perform three times in a two-week period without losing my mind. It’s so effective, I’m expanding it, at least for the next 6-7 weeks (and maybe longer. I suspect longer). A couple of large blocks of time a week are helpful for giving myself the breathing room to be at home in my own life and experience all that it has to offer.
Tidying – Being physically at home with an open schedule more often makes me more aware of things there that need tending to. I’m not sure when tidying became less of a chore and more of a joy, but I’m grateful for that. I suspect it had a lot to do with Marie Kondo’s approach and the example she continues to set about paying attention to what gives you joy and focusing your time and energy on those things. When I know the results of work will be so pleasant, the work itself seems less like an overwhelming drudgery and more like just the way I’m taking to get there. For the next few weeks, I want to spend at least five minutes tidying a different small area of my apartment every day to make it more functional and cozy.
Fun at work – OK, so my work situation is not great. But March is staff appreciation month, which is my favorite month of the year at UNT, and it’s a reminder that even if something is necessary but not a good fit, it still doesn’t have to be a total drag. During Lent (and hopefully beyond), I want to do one fun thing at work a day. Whether it’s taking a long walk across campus, decorating my desk, or attending a Hula dancing program (which I am absolutely signed up for), I want to learn how to make the most of it as long as I’m here.
Money issues – Two of the main reasons money makes me so anxious is that I don’t make quite enough to cover my needs plus a few small joys on a consistent basis, and I am acutely aware of how quickly the little I do make can be reduced or consumed if I’m not (and even sometimes when I am) constantly vigilant about it. To ease some of this pressure (ideally – I’m so very, very anxious), one of my goals for the year is to identify some way each month that I can either make or save more money. That’s been going fairly well, but now that I have a taste of cutting back, I’m no longer wanting to limit it to one a month. So I’m going to rip the bandage off and create a bare-bones budget that I can imagine actually sticking to. I hope to work out the kinks in March-May so that hopefully I have a better budget in place at the start of the summer. I expect that there will be tears as I let go of some things that I enjoy but are just too much right now but also hopefully some relief as, ideally, it will free up some funds to take care of other things I’ve been neglecting.
Setting weekly creative goals, reading a whole lot of books, and strength training are all seeing regular progress, so I’m just going to keep doing what’s working there.
If you observe Lent, I hope you have all the time you need this season. If you don’t observe, I hope you have a wonderful next few weeks that are as stress-free as possible. And I wish a good day to all!
Aw, Advent candles and pockets. Ignore the ash on the table.
Advent is soon! I’m considering Celtic Advent this year, because the four-ish weeks never seem long enough.
Cozy is the main reason I like Advent and Christmas. The lights, presence, pleasure (coffee, tea, wine, cake, etc.), communal/equality, gratitude, comfort, togetherness, shelter/home of it. I get why this season is hard for a lot of people, especially those who live here and don’t celebrate Christmas, especially if they work or have worked in retail where they play the most annoying Christmas songs ad nauseum for months on end. And in some ways, it’s hard for me, too. But a spot of melancholy hardly ever keeps me from enjoying something.
I do feel compelled to keep a lot of my joy about the season under the radar (except here and now on the internet, of course) so that I don’t become part of the intense way that others try to shove the holiday down everyone’s throat (looking at you, Starbucks cup zealots). Luckily, I’m usually so caught up in preparing for services at church and other fun things I enjoy this time of year that I miss a lot of that, especially during Advent. Because of the way it falls around work schedules and family gatherings, the twelve days of Christmas partly become a transitional time of letting go and tucking in to prepare for the new year. It’s the time of the year that I’m most likely to enjoy getting by on as little as possible and appreciating what I have.
I don’t know if it’s the start of the church year or (some of) the seasonal music or the (mythical) sweater weather, but the season is very cozy to me. Some of my traditions include going to the farm, reading night the night before I leave (I often buy new pajamas and book specifically for the evening), and coming home to rest. Then there’s the best week of the year (Christmas to New Year’s Day) with goal-setting and shopping and catching up with friends but not really planning anything. I used to plan a lot before the week but I’ve found that it’s even more relaxing if the weeks leading up to it are calm, too.
I tend to celebrate seasons more than holidays, so I don’t know that I have specific traditions for certain days. What are some of yours?
“If hygge was a person, I think it would be Alice Waters.” Meik Wiking – The Little Book of Hygge
From the moment I heard about Alice Waters and her connection to the Slow Food movement, I’ve been hooked. Maybe it’s because I grew up on a farm where we grew our own peaches and pecans and enjoyed the bounty of MeMaw’s robust garden. Perhaps it’s because I’ve always harbored secret fantasies of building my own version of Chez Panisse. It could just be the simple fact that good food, especially food grown or produced within driving distance and/or cooked with love, gives me a solid sense of place like nothing else can.
The fastest way to my affection is to cook for me. One of my favorite birthdays was one of the years I was vegan. I was having a hard time coming up with a restaurant that all my friends would enjoy and where I also could get food I loved and would eat. I was about to give up when my sister offered her house to host a potluck. My friends brought over such a feast of all my favorite vegan things. It was so kind and generous and the best gift I could have asked for. Another favorite birthday was the year I invited everyone over to my apartment and served three kinds of lasagne.
I don’t always love cooking, but I love sharing food. I doubt I’ll ever actually own a restaurant, but I love feeding people. For me, there’s no such thing as a lush life without shared meals.
I go through phases of different favorite things to make. Bread. Pie. Cookies. Risotto. A couple of times, Maggie and I put aside a whole weekend to bake and invite people over to enjoy what we made. Cookie weekend was epic. Pie weekend was pretty good, too. Maybe July wasn’t the best time to bake pies all weekend, but it was delicious.
I’m on a real soup kick right now. Yesterday, I did not want to go to the grocery store, so I did a pantry sweep to see what I could make for the week without running that particular errand. Imagine my delight at finding a goldmine of yellow split peas. With some onions and bell peppers and a few herbs, I now have a vat of one of my favorite soups to indulge in all week. Bliss.
Saturday, our church is hosting its annual Empty Bowls luncheon, and I’m looking forward to sampling soups from several restaurants in the area. Maybe I’ll even host a soup party of my own someday.
M. Suzanne Terry 