M. Suzanne Terry

I don’t have a lot of “signature” things.  I have favorites, but you’ll notice that that word is plural.  I don’t have a signature fragrance, because I have many favorites – lemon, coffee, caramel, vanilla, amber, apple, coconut, etc. – and I use them pretty equally.  I don’t have a signature dish, because I have many favorite foods and favorite meals.

I do have a signature color. Red.

That doesn’t mean that red is my favorite color (if pressed to choose, it would probably be orange.  Probably.).  It doesn’t even mean that red is the color I wear most often – that would be green (because UNT…and well, let’s just say it – I look awesome in green).

I consider red my signature color because it’s the color that most closely expresses my habits and leanings.

1. My emotions are red.

I don’t always express my emotions, but when I do, they come out red.  It’s anger.  Or passion.  Or when I’m really riled up, it’s both.  It’s fiery. I’ve been told that, because I tend to be reserved, sometimes the fire is shocking.  I accept that.  I mean, I’m in my head, so I know that it started as a smolder, but I can see how it might look like I go from zero to flame-thrower in no time.

2. My environment is red.

Say what you want about fire, but you can’t deny that it’s warm.  Red is the color I am most drawn to when I decorate.  If they sell an appliance in red, that’s the one I’m going to want.  Red invites me.  It invigorates me. It defies complacency. Red sparks lively conversation.  I try to pour as  much red into my surroundings as possible.

3. My life is red.

Red signifies change.  For someone who claims to hate change as much as I do, I certainly do a lot of it. My life seems like a constant state of editing, revising, regrouping, reordering, and reevaluating.  As much as I like schedules and order, and as much as I value good time management and the reliability of sticking to what I say I’m going to do, there’s something so satisfying about taking that proverbial (and sometimes literal) red pen, slashing through whatever is not quite working, and replacing it with something better.

Today at the end of our launch meeting of Story 101, Elora asked us what we needed to give ourselves permission to do. My gut reaction was “permission to change,” but I don’t think that’s the whole of it. More specifically, I need to give myself permission to view change as productive instead of negative. I need to stop seeing all those red marks as failure and start seeing them as what they really are – fine-tuning.  They are the refining fire that burns away all that is almost and not quite in order to leave what is just right.