I won’t tell you what’s in this cup.
Let’s just say that it’s not anything like the coffee I usually drink, and leave it at that.
I woke up this morning, and I went into the kitchen to make coffee. My trusty coffee jar was empty. Under normal circumstances, this would not be cause for alarm. I keep extra coffee – as I buy in bulk – in larger, airtight containers in the cabinet. I looked in my cabinet. No coffee. My pulse quickened as I opened the freezer, hoping beyond hope that I somehow lost my mind and stashed a bag in there.
Nothing. There was nothing. The skies darkened as the horrible realization began to seep in.
I’m still coming to terms with it.
I ran out of coffee. Surely the apocalypse is nigh.
“It’s okay. It’s okay,” I whispered, as I searched in vain for a paper bag into which to breathe. “I can just drive through…OH, NO!”
Dilemma – to drive through for a sub par coffee-like substance in order to satisfy the caffeine craving, making myself late to work and almost certainly picking up a snack as well, or to make something that I did have work.
I chose the latter. I am still undecided on whether it was the better choice.
Themes, observations, and lessons:
– Never, ever run out of coffee. I thought I already knew this, but apparently…no.
– There is danger in reorganizing my schedule and priorities. Hours-in-a-week are finite. Part of the draw of fast food is that it’s convenient – that it’s on the way – a way I would already be going. It’s not something extra I have to make a lot of extra time to do. When I make extra time for things like cooking and cleaning up afterwards, that takes away time from something I was doing before. This time, what got left out was ordering coffee. I suppose this is better than forgetting to show up for work, but still. I want to figure out how to make good changes without losing what I love.
M. Suzanne Terry 
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