I love transitional periods. This fondness makes today one of my favorite days of the year. The short last day of work before the break that starts another transitional period between the year we are finishing and the year ahead. Other than the time surrounding my birthday, this is usually my very favorite week.
It’s also joy season.
I mean, joy is for always. But I am paying particular attention to it these days, trying to find it wherever and whenever I can. I love this piece by Dr. Chanequa Walker-Barnes where she shares her secret for finding joy, especially this quote: “I cultivate joy as a discipline, attentive to finding it in life’s everyday moments, determined to ride this thing until the wheels fall off. In a death-dealing culture, joy is a form of resistance. I am decidedly oppositional in my joy.”
Seeing joy as resistance to the junk of the world is a nice motivation to pursue it more assertively.
Here are some ways I plan to do that over my break from work:
Spending quality time with family and friends
Making art (writing, music, baking, crafts, etc.)
Reading for long, luxurious stretches of time
Cleaning out the parts of my apartment that seem cluttered to make them cozy and functional again
The season of Advent, that is. It’s (probably) my favorite season of the church year and one of the reasons I tend to say “Happy Holidays” rather than “Merry Christmas” during most of December (you know, other than the usual reason of wanting my well wishes to others to be as unconditional, as free of strings and assumptions, as possible). I am especially glad today that the weather seems to understand it’s December and is behaving accordingly.
Here are five things I’ve read in the last few weeks that I thought you might enjoy, too.
How To Have Cancer by Cory Doctorow – I resonate with so much here. The hoops you have to jump through. The inevitable “I wish I’d done it this way to make it a little less stressful/more effective.” I’m glad Doctorow is OK. I’m glad we’re both (generally) OK.
A Brief What, Why, & How of Advent by Tsh Oxenreider – I was recently asked what Advent was about and I rambled a lot. Enthusiastically, but still so much rambling. Here is a much more succinct version. I don’t do everything on this list (and my tradition uses blue candles – for hope/peace/healing – rather than purple – for royalty/penance – during Advent), but this is a lovely explanation.
But How Do You Read So Much? by Pandora Sykes – “I will find ways, as I always do, to not do the other stuff, so that I can find time to read.” Yes, that’s it. That’s the big secret. I read so much because I really, really want to read so much. I thoroughly enjoy it. When I’m not reading, I’m usually thinking about what I have read recently and counting the minutes until I can get back to it. But if you only want to read as much as I want to do Pilates every day (i.e., only a little – usually more of an “I should” than an “I want” situation, unless I’m feeling particularly tight or sore in an area I know it will help), then maybe give yourself a break about how infrequently you read and focus on all the wonderful and life-giving things you do instead.
Why Walking Helps Us Think by Ferris Jabr – This piece was a fantastic motivation to take more walks. If you only get one free New Yorker article a month, this would be a good one to use it for!
And a bonus bullet point this week – I joined Bluesky – Roxane Gay said it best – “Some people don’t get exposed to other points of view in their day-to-day lives so they need social media for that. Some of us have friends and colleagues and family. And it shows.”
Happy November! It is a blustery, rainy day with potential for storms. I guess Texas is just gonna have two tornado seasons from now on? Cool. Cool cool cool.
Sounds like a good reason to stay inside and read.
I’ve got a few things lined up to discuss in book clubs this month:
Killers of a Certain Age by Deanna Raybourn (already read, so will probably just review a synopsis for discussion next week)
Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt (already read and will absolutely be listening to it again because I love it)
It is at this point of the year that my interest in actually completing all the reading challenges I’ve taken on starts to fizzle. I begin to relish the idea of reading only for enjoyment for a couple of months. I’m still on track to finish my 180 books (my main reading goal), but my passion for the smaller challenges I chose to broaden my interests and knowledge is seriously waning. Right on schedule, as soon as the first crisp breeze blew through last week, I stocked up on more things at the library just because they caught my eye and started to comb my own collection for “hey – I forgot I had and wanted to read this!” selections.
So while I have finished the libro.fm challenge (post coming up in a few days) and will likely still finish another challenge or two, I’m not gonna sweat it from here on out. I’m just going to do what I want (I mean, even more than usual). I’m going to finish up some of the cozies I listed last month. Then I’ll likely turn to the books below.
But no real promises.
First, there are some library books that need some attention:
One Dark Window by Rachel Gillig (finished this one last night – immediately put the second on hold at the library. So good!)
Then I may read through some things on Modern Mrs. Darcy’s list of quiet novels. Quiet is the theme of the year, after all. I do really love “compelling, character-driven reads,” and if the rest of these are anywhere near as lovely as Bel Canto (the last one on the list), I’m sold.
This past weekend, I participated (loosely) in Dewey’s 24-hour Readathon. The official time was 8 a.m. Saturday to 8 a.m. Sunday (EST). But I (and various others in the Discord and in the Facebook group) rarely actually stick to the time of the event. My goal, for example, was to simply read a collective 24 hours. I think the Dewey’s team is on to us – instead of hourly challenges, they just listed a handful of challenges to complete “at any time during the readathon.”
I completed no challenges.
I didn’t read a full 24 hours.
I barely remembered to post the picture of the stack I was choosing from (see above) on the group’s social media pages.
I carried on with plans to attend my favorite yearly Halloween party and Spiderdead, brazenly cutting into the hours I would usually set aside on readathon weekends to read.
I finished three books, but only one of them is actually in this stack (Fang Fiction – pretty cute!).
What I got out of the readathon was still pretty magical.
I got to tuck into stories about found families and books and several other favorite themes. I ate good, simple food, so I rested better (weird how that happens) and thus felt more refreshed when the weekend was over (despite it being a “busy” one). I embraced my full homebody self without the usual twinge of guilt about what a person who lives alone should want to do on the weekend.
These twinges are getting smaller and less frequent as I age. One reason for this is that I’m accepting who I am more and becoming less apologetic about it with each passing month. Another reason is that I get so much joy and restoration out of my alone time that there is little to no room left for feeling bad about it.
At any rate, I had a great weekend, and I look forward to many more like it as the season changes.
I could eat my weight in cherries. I won’t (probably). But I could.
When I typed the title of this post, my gut reaction was “Nothing. Not a damn thing.” I feel like my plate is already full for this summer. So rather than come up with a lot of extra things to do to feel like I’m getting the most out of this season (the worst season, to be clear…it’s so, so hot…I just want to lie in a bucket of ice), I decided to limit myself to four doable things as a reminder that there’s no need to get ambitious.
Finish radiation treatments – When they start in the next week or two, this is going to be a 5-days-a-week-for-7-weeks ordeal. The silver lining is that it’s paid for, thanks to the generous (and fast!) funding of my GoFundMe!
Eat low-maintenance meals – We’re talking meals that look like small charcuterie boards (fruit, raw veggies, cheese, nuts, crackers, bread, jam, pickled things), sandwiches, and salads. Maybe the occasional breakfast burrito or fried egg on toast. Sometimes pasta or a quick stir fry. But if it takes more than 10 minutes to make it, I don’t want it.
Indulge my sweet tooth – I’ve been so careful with sugar this year to give myself the best chance of feeling good and not crashing. But sometimes, I just want something sweet, so I’m going to give in a little bit now that feeling-good days are happening more consistently. I’ve already ordered the key lime bundt from Nothing Bundt Cakes to pick up this afternoon.
Read and attend book clubs – I missed all my book clubs in May due to health issues, and it definitely put a damper on the month. I also haven’t read as much this year as I intended, due to a lack of focus, which is understandable, I guess. My goal for summer is to keep feeling good enough that I can get back to my usual bookish self (or a close approximation).
This reminder to slow my roll was technically for me, but maybe you need it, too? If so, consider this a gentle, caring nudge from me to you to confirm that you are already doing enough so maybe just sit in front of the fan and relax for a minute.
Welcome to May! The last month for a while when temperatures in Texas are likely to be anywhere near reasonable. The end of the semester. The beginning of summer (including summer training). Surgery toward the end of the month.
Lots of things going on, but maybe also plenty of time to read. Here’s what I’m planning on this month.
Book Clubs
Real Americans by Rachel Khong – I know I haven’t been including my subscriptions, but when it’s both Nowhere’s Fantastic Strangelings pick AND Roxane Gay’s pick for the month, I probably want to go ahead and read it. Also will meet the standard for 52 Book Club’s prompt “A sticker on the cover” and Nowhere’s “A Nowhere Book Club pick.”
Mad Honey by Jodi Picoult and Jennifer Finney Boylan – Not sure I’ll get around to re-reading it, but it is seared into my brain, so I’m excited to talk about it with friends again! If you haven’t read it, definitely pick it up.
The Measure by Nikki Erlick – Another possible re-read, especially as I’m slated to lead the discussion. This was one of my favorite books that I read last year.
Dinosaurs by Lydia Millet – A story of hope amidst a sea of existential dread. Same, Dinosaurs.
When Women Were Dragons by Kelly Barnhill – Historical fiction for Rise & Shine group, a “fiery feminist fantasy.” Sounds like something I would love.
There are several books I’m finishing from previous months, and I’m on a Phryne Fisher kick with my audio selections, so a few of those will likely make an appearance this month, too.
I hope you get some time to read something you love this month!
The past few years, I’ve made a summer bucket list. Mostly, I’ve done it because I have to talk myself into liking summer as a season because it is so, so hot in Texas and that’s the worst. It also keeps me more grounded in the present instead of always focusing on future plans. And of course, making these lists is also a good way to check in with goals to either make sure I’m on track or get myself back on track.
So why not do that with every season?
Here are some things I want to do this spring.
Buy fresh flowers. I have received so many flowers this year, and it’s been lovely. I mean, some of them have made me sneeze and thus had to live elsewhere for a little while. But I really love seeing fresh flowers when I come home. Bonus to picking out/buying them myself? I know I’ll get what I love and still be able to breathe normally.
Plant citrus trees. My friend Jessica gave me a bunch of citrus seeds, and soon (this weekend, maybe?) I’m going to plant them in buckets to see if they come up. I’ve already got the pots and the soil, so all that’s left to do is plant!
Drink tea and read when it rains. It rains so much this time of year, and I don’t take advantage of that nearly as often as I could. A cup of tea and a good book are excellent accompaniments to a chorus of rain. It’s my ideal quiet morning/afternoon/any time.
Play springy playlist when cooking. Cooking is relaxing to me, but lately it’s been mostly a utilitarian, get-in-get-out, cutting-corners process. I want to reintroduce my former habit of playing music to set the mood and make cooking more fun. I have all sorts of playlists for this already (brunch, spring, etc.); it’s just a matter of remembering to put one on when I start.
Get my feet ready for sandal season. I often neglect my feet during winter. I’ve been doing better this year out of necessity (the neuropathy side effects of chemo are no joke), but I still want to give them a little extra TLC before I expose them to the elements with summer footwear.
Re-establish my strength routine and take some long walks. My back seized up for the first time ever last week. Clearly a sign that I’ve been slacking on my core strength. Or that I’m just getting older. But a solid strength routine and regular walks can only help with both physical and mental health, so I want to make both a priority again.
Visit the Denton Community Market. This is the best place to get local, seasonal produce. Also, it’s just one of my favorite things Denton does. Bonus to going in spring rather than summer – the weather outside may actually be bearable.
This month is out of control already, but I am reading up a storm. Carving out the necessary time to do so is even more crucial in busy months.
I’m also participating in Susannah Conway’s December Reflections challenge as part of my reflecting-on-the-year process. Today’s prompt is ‘Best Decision of 2023,’ and hands down, the best decision I made was applying for and accepting the Coordinator for Housing Services job. I love working more closely with the Housing Ambassadors in a position where I get to both witness and aid in their professional growth. It’s such a privilege. (Having my own office is nice, too.)
Really Good, Actually by Monica Heisey – I gave this book 4 stars for two reasons. First, one of my favorite audiobook narrators, Julia Whelan, reads it. Superb. Highly recommend. Second, the main character, while a mess, is embarrassingly relatable to me. She leaned full in to that downward spiral after her divorce, and that is exactly my irrational bad attitude after a breakup or fizzling of any kind. Everything is terrible, love is a sham, wallow and refuse to heal for a good minute because if you don’t, the cults of productivity and respectability politics win. This is exactly what that feels like and (spoiler alert) what it feels like to emerge.
Foreverland: On the Divine Tedium of Marriage by Heather Havrilesky – I mean, the title alone was enough to hook me. An unflinchingly honest memoir about the joys and trials of marriage. I think anyone who is planning to get married (ever) should absolutely read this book so they can go ahead and set reasonable expectations for it. I would also recommend it to those who are married as a cathartic “Oh, good – it’s not just us” or “Oh, good – at least we don’t do that” or “Oh, wow – maybe we should get some therapy” tool. I would expect nothing less of Ask Polly.
Mad Honey by Jodi Picoult and Jennifer Finney Boylan – FANTASTIC. I zoomed through the audio this past weekend because it’s been on my TBR for a minute and one of our work book clubs was scheduled to discuss it this week. I’m going to recommend it to at least two other book clubs for next year. I appreciate it when popular authors are humble enough to bring in other writers to collaborate on books that center on things outside their own experience. It makes the story so much richer.
The Disaster Tourist by Yun Ko-Eun – Dark eco-tourism tale. My favorite parts of the writing were the bits of humor sprinkled throughout, which gave it a moderately unhinged, uncertain mood. I’d be feeling a certain way about the horrible things it was describing and then one of the characters would do something quirky or slightly charming, and the effect was jarring. Really well-written and unsettling.
Soon, we are off to our over-the-top departmental holiday party. It’s my favorite Christmas party at work of the year. Then I am getting my hair done…and going to Chelby’s I-beat-cancer party…and Molten Plains Fest is tonight. It’s just going to be a good day.
I hope you have a good day and a great weekend, too!
Tomorrow, our Rise and Shine book club is discussing spooky reads and there’s a Halloween party in the evening. On Sunday, there is a book fair at a local bar and our annual Spiderdead show in the afternoon, and then I have an RLA interest presentation (the last one I’m giving this year!) early that evening. I’m definitely taking Monday and Tuesday off for what will be some much-needed and long-overdue downtime.
Here are five food-related/adjacent ponderings I’ve had this week:
I especially love this time of year because, while I do enjoy some spooky things and darker themes, I mostly just love how much cozier everything is. Cool weather (actual cool weather, not the “it’s no longer in the triple digits must be a cold front ha ha” phenomenon) is on its way in the next 48 hours. I will wrap up in a blanket with a cup of tea and a bowl of popcorn while I settle in to re-watch a soul-soothing show or movie any time of the year, but cool weather means I can do that without cranking up the A/C. Tonight I’m probably going to watch something hygge/homey/foodie from this list. My regulars are Chocolat or Under the Tuscan Sun, but the list reminds me of quite a few I haven’t seen in a while, and also how did I miss A Good Year?
Legends and Lattes by Travis Baldree – I think I’ve found the genre I want to write. Cozy fantasy. This one was especially lovely to me because the main character is an Orc who decided to leave the mercenary life to open a coffee shop. I WANT TO LEAVE THE MERCENARY (I mean, Student Affairs, but sometimes it’s basically the same) LIFE TO OPEN A COFFEE SHOP. It’s like The Hobbit, but if Bilbo had just said, “No, thank you, but would you like another spot of tea?” instead of going on the adventure. It taps into my deep-seated desire to have a home that is so cozy and welcoming that I never want to leave and is also a place where I can feed people and watch their faces as they have those little moments of joy that a really good cup of coffee or delicious pastry can bring.
The main thing I like about joining Tertulia is all the discounts I get (and also I enjoy their co-op vibe). Another thing I like is that I get curated lists like this one in my inbox with recommendations to add to my home foodie collection. Alice Feiring’s To Fall in Love, Drink This has been on my TBR for a while. That may be my next Tertulia purchase.
I’m pretty good about keeping my pantry and freezer (and to a lesser extent, my fridge – sometimes some questionable things linger in there) reasonably stocked and cleaned out. When space is limited, it only takes a little swerve in the direction of either sparse or out of control to have me ordering takeout more often than I (and by I, I do mean my budget) would like. But occasionally, I get a wild hair and end up buying way more of one item than I need. Right now, I have so many canned beans in my apartment. I mean, as overages go, shelf-stable ones are my preference, but dang. I guess I’m having beans in just about everything I cook at home for the foreseeable future.
I really could have used a list like this when I was first starting out as a new-ish home cook. There’s lots of great advice and resources linked in here. It also sparked a bit of nostalgia through several moments when I thought, “I remember when I learned that!” It took me so long to figure out that “What are your favorite flavors and textures?” is such an important question for me when it comes to a meal plan that I’ll actually use (rather than one that I feel is a good plan I should want to use – very different things).
My long weekend is so close I can taste it. I hope your weekend is nice!
This month, y’all. It’s a wild one. I like my new job, but I miss my easy Octobers. Also, the world seems to be a little bit more on fire (proverbial and otherwise) than usual. I’m taking a couple of long weekends and some extra nights off this week, but I need a real break. And I need a breath to process all that’s happening so that I can actually wind down well enough at the end of the day to get more than 3-4 hours of sleep. Don’t know when that’s going to happen.
In the meantime, I am embracing the slightly cooler weather with all my favorite comforts. Soups, easy one-pot meals, and breakfast tacos are on the menu for the week. I’m also enjoying a near-constant intake of warm beverages.
Coffee and tea are my staples. Hot Tang is also a frequent visitor to my repertoire (although clearly, I’ve been doing it wrong by neglecting to add whiskey). I even drank a plain cup of hot water the other day. I love warm beverages.
Coffee brews all day at the farm and has for as long as I can remember. Mom doesn’t like it strong, so the caffeine release is significantly slower (allegedly). Tea was always iced unless you were sick (because Texas). I didn’t start drinking hot tea in earnest until I came to college, but now it’s my usual way to drink tea.
But there was one hot tea drink we had growing up that was an instant comfort to me. I’ve heard it called Russian tea and friendship tea, but to us, it was just spiced tea. Mom often made it around the holidays, and she made a lot of it because we gave it as gifts. She would mix all the ingredients together and fill pint-sized jars with a cross-stitched lid that read “spiced tea” with a picture of a cup beside it (I think – my memory of the picture is hazy at best). She would do the same with hot chocolate mix (I can’t remember if she mixed her own of this as well or just bought it in bulk) with another cute cross-stitched label that read “hot chocolate.”
I can’t seem to find the actual recipe, but I often helped with the mixing (even I could be trusted to stir). I think the proportions of a batch went something like this:
2 cups powdered Tang
2 cups powdered lemonade (always Country Time)
1 cup instant tea (always Lipton)
1 teaspoon ground cloves
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
Do yourself a favor – mix up a batch of this, pour hot water over a couple of heaping spoons in a cup, stir, and enjoy. Feel free to play around with the proportions. It’s very sweet, but that’s just part of its charm.
I’m on an Irish Breakfast Tea kick right now, but I may have to add these ingredients to my next grocery list so I can have this mix on hand. I may also dig around for the cross-stitch patterns next time I’m home. I know some people who need this mix and a cute jar in their lives.
A cup of Mom’s spiced tea may be just what I need to make this hectic October a little sweeter.
M. Suzanne Terry 