M. Suzanne Terry

“I think that there are as many minds as there are heads and as many kinds of love as there are hearts.” – from Tolstoy’s Anna Karenina

I’m currently reading two (two…five…whatever) books right now. I still haven’t finished the one for book club earlier this month, but I like it, so I’m working my way through. I am also working through Anna Karenina. I really had hoped I would love it. I have 300 more pages. Tolstoy can still turn it around. I believe in him. I am liking it more than I did when I started, so I guess that’s something.

The book I’m reading for Advent – Those Who Wait by Tanya Marlow – has me pondering love and the odd ways it shows up (or fails to do so…lots of thoughts and feelings about that). So, of course, quotes about love are standing out to me.

From Alice Hoffman’s Faithful – 

“Love is a mystery. It’s like an alien abduction. You think you’re on earth, and there you are among the stars.”

Once during my mastermind writer’s group, we had a conversation about our past romantic entanglements. I told the story about a close friend that I met my freshman year of college who started dating one of my other friends. When they started going out, others started treating me like I had been wronged and offering to listen “if I needed to talk.” Apparently, they were under the impression that my close friend and I had been dating and the other friend stole him away. So, laughing, I told him what they said, and he got very awkward, replying, “Um. Yeah. Weren’t we?”

Were we? Huh. NEWS TO ME. After listening to this and a few other stories several of us told, one of my friends said, “Hearing you talk about your past relationships is like hearing about alien abductions.”

He’s not wrong. I have learned that people thought our relationship status was different than I believed it to be several times. As the common denominator in these scenarios, I suppose I should take some of the blame. But also – how hard is it to have a conversation where we actually say out loud who we are to each other? I admit I’m not great at picking up on verbal hints. Physical cues? I’m pretty good at that. But if it’s just verbal, I’m going to need something more along the lines of “I like you and want to be exclusive. Check yes or no,” than just vague comments about my general delightfulness. Because frankly, I get that from people who definitely just want to be friends, so if you want more, you need to be clearer.

Even when there’s rampant miscommunication and misunderstanding, though, to be loved (or even liked a whole lot) is pretty dreamy.